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phoenix axel - sarcastic amount of optimism lyrics

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you’re getting dressed
for your 21st
in your new apartment
your girlfriends say how pretty you look
as you say, “i won’t be coming
home alone tonight”
i think about you
and wonder if three years ago you would’ve
still put me in this room
and that’s fine
i only got dressed up tonight

and there’s enough days before halloween
where i can be
every character i need
group costume no guarantee
and i know your plans
you said, “don’t ask if
i’m free”

am i closing myself off?
reading a novel in the sentence you didn’t mean
you said i wouldn’t last forever
but i guess i should’ve agreed
but i’ve lost the ability
to fake sympathy
and that’s fine
i’ve had enough practice i know what i’m
supposed to be like
and there’s enough days before
new year’s eve where i can lean
to be alone in so many underwhelming themes

and i won’t say i miss you
‘cause honestly i don’t want to
in a month you’ll ask to see if
i’m alive and i’ll
play it off say that
i’m alright
and that i miss you
‘cause that’s what you want me to do

and there’s enough days before i turn 23 to figure out
how to be everything you want me to be
i’ve lost touch with how to be free (free)
trying to reverse the prospect of caring so deeply
and maybe i’m not cut out for this
you’ve made a name for yourself
and i’m lying through my t++th
and that’s fine

- phoenix axel lyrics

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