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polarisbinarystarsystem - apex!!! lyrics

[intro]
is it destiny that we all end where we start
if so, then it’s a shame cause we’re meant to fall apart

[verse 1]
i don’t want it all to end, i just wanna live my life
but is it really worth it if desire was a lie

[verse 2]
shards of glass in my mouth a piece slips across my tongue
what’s that tang in my mouth i know it’s the taste of blood
and i’m learning from experience avoiding all the pain
only now to realize everything was done in vain

[chorus]
i’ll take their words and twist them round and shove them down their throat
watch them suffocatе but wish that i would choke
all contact cut off it’s a perfect еxecution
when i look at them i only see “low resolution”
chemicals in my brain, the feelings are but an illusion
at least that’s what they say though i don’t think it’s a delusion
bloodstains on the floor and on my shirt but they aren’t mine
feeling pretty tired so i’ll rest and give it time
betrayed by my own hands i am stuck inside my dreams
yet i don’t fear for my own life, nothing’s as it seems
[verse 3]
and it’s not self+preservation i lack
i just can’t shake the feeling that i’m under attack
who’s this blurry figure in this flashback
time moves forward so i’m never going back

[verse 4]
new faces and new voices but the feelings aren’t new
and all i ever wanted was to be a part of you

[refrain]
i don’t want it all to end, i just wanna live my life
but is it really worth it if desire was a lie

[verse 5]
walk right into the spider web and cut out my own tongue
words on the obituary “died from loss of
blood”
learning to experience, experience the pain
i know it doesn’t matter cause i forgot my own name

[chorus]
the words they boil up but they’re all caught inside my throat
hold a stone, tie the noose, will it sink or will it float
all contact cut off it’s a perfect execution
i can’t find a way out of this, there isn’t a solution
iv needles in my veins and the pain is an illusion
and i’m starting to believe “maybe it’s a delusion”

[verse 6}
and it’s not self+preservation i lack
i just can’t shake the feeling that i’m under attack
and i need to k!ll the voices but they’re buried deep inside
there’s one way left to carve them out so i guess i got to try

[verse 7]
new methods and new marks but agony isn’t new
and nothing i ever wanted was even real or true

[outro]
shove the scissors up my nose slam my head into a desk
close my eyes and touch the sun boy i think you know the rest
betrayed by my own feelings you were stuck inside my heart
yet i don’t fear for my own life as my flesh is torn apart
new faces and new voices but the feelings aren’t new
and all i ever wanted was to be a part of you

- polarisbinarystarsystem lyrics

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