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portals - burdened lyrics

nothing feels right
i’m always constantly searching for a reason to stay alive
time after time
the depression grabs a hold of me and carves me with a f-cking knife
things will never change, i’ve always been this way
i’m just a byproduct of young life gone to waste
things will never change, i’ve always been this way
i’m just a dead man walking
you f-cking coward
eternal suffering, forever pained
why do i always have to feel this way?
every day just feels the same
always searching for a feeling that i will never regain
i’ve spent my life wallowing in misery
washed up, lifeless, drowning in my apathy
years have been spent building up a hardened sh-ll
fighting losing battles, and yet still, no one can ever tell
this is h-ll
i am just a f-cking waste
dead to a world that never cared for me
a soulless being
i never feel a thing
dead to a world, a world that never f-cking cared for me
dis-ssociation. the burden of a heavy mind
decomposing while my body still stays alive
rotting away. still staying the same
i’m just counting down the minutes ’til i reach my final day
just f-cking end it all
withering into nothing as
my mind slips into a haze
misery develops into twisted senses of normality
and i could use the company
but some things never change
forever burdened
forever drained

- portals lyrics

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