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present absence - bleed lyrics

[intro]
“there’s no such thing as love, without the antic+p+tion of loss. you know it’s ridiculous. you know it’s ridiculous while you’re experiencing it. you know, that most people manage to listen to their messages, and eat lunch, and organise themselves to take a shower and go out of the front door, and that it’s not a big deal. and yet, you are nonetheless in its grip and you are unable to figure out any way around it.”

i’ve been tryin’ to resist
it ain’t meant to be
siege of brain, singed my pain
and it comforts me
though at night my eyеlids twitch
twist in 180
if i won’t feel the strain, i won’t fall asleep

i need something to distract my head
rеstful peace brings too much to digest
if only i could disappear and then
become a poltergeist on your windowsill

static noise drones
behind my eyes buzzing between the temples
daunting thoughts
swinging back and forth like the scythes
may i get close?

it’ll keep talkin’ and talkin’ until i’ll blow a gun
i’ve been stuck under debris and you could sort it out
but the hurt has sealed the veins, why would you give a f+ck?
if i get myself a tie, won’t even feel goin’ numb
it’ll keep talkin’ and talkin’ until i blow a gun
i’ve been here out of place, i don’t belong the crowd
and when you see a golden lining ring the raining clouds
i hope you know it would be me reaching for you out

keep, keep, keep, keep, keep, keep
in your memory
keep, keep, keep, keep, keep
i will come for me, me
but please, you see, i want to live
i’m just so hurt to even feel me bleed

feel me, feel me, feel me
feel me, feel me bleed

every time i try to sit still
i can’t help but sacrifice
all of those little fractions of my head straight to my heart
and every second it gets harder to get up, to wake up
to fill up the sp+ce around those who don’t give a f+ck

god, i don’t even know why i’m writing all these songs
i try to feel less pathetic in my consistency of thoughts
but how it even matters, when all i do feel is loss
though it’s the only way i realise i’ve been in love
keep, keep, keep, keep, keep, keep
in your memory
keep, keep, keep, keep, keep
i will come for me, me
but please, you see, i want to live
i’m just so hurt to even feel me bleed

you reminded me of stars
i gaze up to feel how far you are
it’ll be alright

- present absence lyrics

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