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prime-one - soldier's story lyrics

1st verse

my father was a patriot,he passed the trait to me
dinnertime,we’d converse about nation occasionally
what i learned from him and school really paved the way for me
to join the military,and a soldier i came to be
prepared to fight for my country and all within its borders
i endured the training and i followed all my orders
before the war,i married and my daughter was conceived
and,into the realm of heaven,my father was received
“son,with what you’ve done,i couldn’t die a prouder man”
i replied “it’s due to you that i’m what and how i am”
he succumbed to cancer,days after we spoke
in eight months,the twin towers turned to ashes and smoke
six months pregnant,my wife expects a child and now the worst
when she’s givin’ birth,i’ll be gone,halfway around the earth
sure enough,i got word,i’m goin’ overseas
en route,a rush of thoughts and emotions came over me
“i’m goin’ to serve my country,though i hope to serve it well
will i return alive and well from what is certain h+ll?”
in my mind,i kept seein’ the look before i left
of a woman who was teary+eyed,sad,and scared to death
the sounds of war distracted me from thoughts of wife and daughter
plus,tryin’ to dull my senses to the smell and sight of slaughter
my fellow troops were family and we had a job to do
afghanistan was home of sorts until we saw it through
logically,i missed seein’ my baby girl’s arrival
i’m searchin’ out for taliban and fightin’ for survival
seein’ poverty,destruction,and the worst of humankind
thinkin’ how none of this sh+t’s known in an infant human’s mind
five months in,i’m injured in a blast from an
improvised device,they couldn’t keep the limb attached
my right arm was lost,three others lost their lives
there’s a price to pay for freedom,always the cost is high

2nd verse

i got the welcome of a hero when i finally made it home
happy to see my family,but i didn’t make it known
there was something goin’ on in me,something that was wrong with me
frontin’ like i’m strong ’cause bein’ honest would’ve honestly
made me feel weak,”f+ck it,i’m a soldier
i’ve handled heavy loads without ’em bucklin’ my shoulders”
my wife needs her husband,my daughter needs her dad
but the wounds i had within were gapin’ and bleedin’ bad
to where a husband and a dad wasn’t something either had
my wife tried to be patient but i knew that she was mad
a shadow of my former self,i was the most erratic mess
ate alive by survivor’s guilt and post+traumatic stress
at times,i wondered who was fortunate more
was it really the one whose life was cut short in the war?
’cause at least they have no memory of the torture and horror
they ain’t on the porch with a forty at four in the morn’
my marriage,like the scotch in my glass,was ‘on the rocks’
my wife’s beyond her wit’s end and says she wants to walk
“i’m tryin’ to understand what you have gone through,believe me
but it ain’t been easy for me neither,i’m leaving”
i thought she would’ve gone on,she never said a thing
all she laid out on the table was her wedding ring
in hindsight,i couldn’t blame her ’cause i pushed her there
a drunken and distant husband was more than she could bear
i remember when returning home to her was in a prayer
and how i longed for the touch and scent of her skin and hair
weeks spent in an empty house was eerie and strange
but to get back what i had needed serious change
so i told my wife the war haunts me like a poltergeist
and apologized for bein’ closed off and cold as ice
said before i bore it all with teardrops in eyes
“there’s a price to pay for freedom,always the cost is high”

3rd verse

thankfully the nightmares and flashbacks wouldn’t last forever
through therapy and treatment,i had got my act together
it was an uphill battle to get past the pain
that hill was rocky and rugged like afghan terrain
both my wife and mother gave me love and support
that and my determination brought recovery forth
eventually,we had a son and named him after a friend
who was k!lled in action in the same blast we were in
but could i really pass the patriotic passion to him?
when our leaders are leadin’ the country to massive ruin
when the system is f+cked up and stacks the deck against
the lower class while these crooked ass banksters cash a check
i felt less of a soldier and more of a p+wn
and this ‘war on terror’was just a deplorable con
like,what the f+ck did i fight for? why did i lose an arm?
when ‘national security’ measures just do us harm
there’s a price to pay for freedom,but freedom’s a party line
toed to keep the war machine goin’ and profit margins fine
ain’t a b+st+rd more unloyal than one who k!lls their own
to strip others of their liberties and capture foreign oil
no,i didn’t want to believe what i had come to
even now,i wish that what i believe in is untrue
’cause it would mean i probably put bullets in some who
i may have had justification to put a gun to
and it would mean that all the harsh criticism
i’ve had for my country is baseless suspicion and cynicism
i’d rather be that,but i’ve taken a look around
and found that what i speak on are matters of fact
what to do except to make the best of life and hope we transcend
our ways of present time and that this silly song and dance ends
if the nation’s fate doesn’t lay in better hands then
there will be soldiers like me with more stories to tell..

- prime one lyrics

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