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privatefuneral - relapse lyrics

[intro]
(lisa floyd’s 911 call)

[verse 1]
i can’t fall asleep no more, there’s demons in the corner
and they’re kicking down the door, i loosened up the hinges
i’ve been doing meditation, i still take my meditation
but, the medicine ain’t working for me, been retaliating on me
walking like a zombie on the pain pills
i ain’t gotta pay bills, but i’m still spending money i ain’t got, it’s like a treadmill

feeling like my life is on a cycle
all my closest friends are suicidal
i used to wanna k!ll myself but died when i was thirteen
started making music and my counselor was worried, but saw me getting pinned against the wall
lately i’ve been dodging all the calls
i don’t wanna talk to you unless you tell me sorry
every day’s the same, a different story from you, unless you want some comfort from me

[verse 2]
i talked about you to my therapist and how you truly love me
but, it’s kinda funny
i think it’s kinda funny how i love you but i really hate it
i don’t know what love is
how can i take care of you if i can’t love myself?
taking all the pictures off my shelf that i put up of you
why do i put up with you?
because of you i’m lying to myself and i promised all my friends that i wouldn’t do the things i did again
i hope they can forgive me for my sins
i called you off the pain meds twice, you didn’t answer
spreading to my brain, you’re like a cancer
my ex girl was a cancer, but i don’t listen to the stars
if imma be a star, i guess i’ll quit before i start
i’m about to relapse cause’ you’re a drug to me
when you’re drugging me i relax
it’s a luxury i guess

- privatefuneral lyrics

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