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punishment test - underneath the trauma i hold lyrics

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[verse 1]
a dark cloud is overpowering me
raging inside is a memory left to be
the inner struggling coiling ropes suddenly
it’s hard facing reality in tragedy

[chorus]
i look away, away from the sunlight
another dream is another fight inside
every branch of me hasn’t grown any direction
i don’t know what i am, even on the inside

[verse 2]
i don’t know if i can be the man in my dreams
every turn is a miss, so will you grant me another wish
i don’t know if i can be the man in the mirror
i look back at myself and see the poison of a flag
loneliness kicks the lampshade next to my bed
cut out thе lights and rethink your choices, he said
i don’t know if i can lovе a man
i don’t know if i can love a girl
sometimes i just don’t know anymore

[chorus]
i look away, away from the sunlight
another dream is another fight inside
every branch of me hasn’t grown any direction
i don’t know what i am, even on the inside
[bridge]
four thousand particles blast a torture attack at me
they say, “be the man i want you to be”
s+xual preference isn’t apart of my disease
the tightening grows faster every time my answers linger

[chorus 2]
a torpedo of emotions hits the right side of my head
i get attracted by people who are and aren’t the same s+x
but i can’t seem to find a reason for why my mind rejects
i can’t seem to find a reason for why my mind projects



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