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puppybreath - vagrants lyrics

[verse 1: puppybreath]
living with my choices and i cannot find a way to stop it
if i take control of what should happen, then i hurt what’s valued
magnificent bellows echo from a distance, i feel nothing
if i do not witness what i leave behind, then i live with it
but it always finds a way to rear my gaze back on the signals
they attempt to convince me i’m better off without my crutches
cut the net of affirmation so that i may reach up skyward
woody stem supports the fruit that hangs above my inner child
it’s made stronger from the weather, but the prize can’t be collected
nesting in my branches is the fragile home of feathered vagrants
they can fly away but never learn their unawakened prowess
i can track the overlap of what i brought from my last prison
i don’t want it, so i trade it for the one i carry with me
it’s concerning how i enter based upon the jumping critters
in my tummy, i know it will fade, but only when i choose it
cushions don’t absorb the impact when that mishap sends me downward
hold a dead core if i try it, wrapped in darkness if i leave it
nothing could compete with what i need to feel the life i’m craving
evidence attests, this path is next to get the chopping treatment
think i’m haughty as a cishet with the body of a rodent
it’s a warped perspective, i’m just breaking and i lost direction
when i hate this journey with a hand, i feel so cold and numb to
never how i thought that i would settle, but i soak my ankles
when i’m well adjusted, i jump in to feel it wasn’t warmer
it was just finessing, so i hope to progress past the heartbreak
in the pilgrimage, i had to leave back what could cut my tendons
[verse 2: knifehaver]
overthinking is a b+tch
don’t know why i think like this
make up worries in my head
and then i get myself all p+ssed
people always p+ss me off
loud people especially
i don’t want an institution
or to go to therapy
why am i just so convinced
everyone wants to hurt me
i have been so paranoid of everyone
for f+cking weeks
n0body can understand
no one hears me when i scream
why’d i go and make the choice
to f+cking question everything
i just wanna be ok for once
why cant i love someone
without thinking
that they’ll pull a gun on me
i just wanna feel alright one time
why cant i trust people that i love
they want me to die
i have been in agony for months
no one seems to notice
sometimes i cant even trust my love
i don’t know my purpose
sometimes everybody wants me gone
and i cannot blame them
push away everyone that i love
and act like i hate them
hoping that i’ll be okay one day
hoping one day things will change one day
hope that all this goes away, it won’t but
i still hope that things will change, they won’t

- puppybreath lyrics

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