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r.lum.r - making a choice lyrics

melatonin doesn’t work anymore
tired/wired on my back on the floor
over-thinking thoughts like never before
-n-lyzing sh-t that i should ignore

everybody’s gonna know you a fake
make you think that you can be who you can’t
lay in wait until you make a mistake
expose you as the f-cking phony you play

i don’t want to spend my 20’s tired, drunk and alone
justifying why i keep you up all night on the phone
i know say it’s cause i love to hear the sound of your voice
but it’s more accurate to say it’s just more clear than the noise
that i can always kinda hear in spite of all that i do
it’s television static playing loud from another room
to which i’ve never found the door to go and “just turn it off”
but i can never stop looking for it…

i’m making a choice (you are the strength of my life)
i’m making a choice (you are the strength of my life)

doesn’t matter what you think that you (l)earned
i don’t think you get the way that this works
you too dark to ever be in the light
born too wrong to ever hope to be right

no one gave you the permission to speak
you are not in a position to lead
what would make you think that you tell the truth
what would make you think that it could be you

i know i think a lot about my different fears and the shame
whether i’m black or white enough to win approval or fame
and if i’m checking off the boxes keeping framily pleased
but still relaying things that let ‘em know this really is me
if i get old will i think fondly of the things that i did
or will i wish that i had never made it out bradenton
the only way i’ll know is seeing this sh-t through to the end
and being sure to build a family from friends

i’m making a choice (you are the strength of my life)
i’m making a choice (you are the strength of my life)

- r lum r lyrics

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