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raxion stance - walk away lyrics

[intro]

++sobs++
++inhales deeply++

yeah. it’s my life. it’s mine. i’m just tryna live it. but i’m so sorry. i’m sorry. forgive me. yeah

[verse 1]

how many people are looking up to me?
how many people are looking down on me?
how many people tell me they’ proud of me? and do mean it without second+guessing what i am bound to be, huh!?
how many people claiming they care for me? and out of those how many are actually there for me?
how many people let me down and step over my hеart?
how many judge why i gave up on god?
wherе were they at when i was a kid and mild too?
so weak in soul and mind too
life bleak in whole, in that coup
i was kept in it was uncool
sun rises, momma wants to
leave for work i need of her love but got none
“this can’t be true”
my health my state was not good
a dumped bundle i was, she won’t cuddle with me i’m numb too
that’s the point it had come to death
i bled as i want to
call for help but momma would
hit me badly, only the neighbor was one to feed me,nclearly i nearly died
an innocent soul caught up in hands of misery
that’s how i came through
[interlude]

it breaks through my soul. sh+t

[verse 2]

i grew up with that i’ve come to
make peace with all that cause you still my mother i loved you so much
can’t undo
the sh+t you put me through
now you can’t answer for yourself can you!?
why did you bring me to this world knowing you could not love me!?
how could you be so spiteful?
to your own son
and now you gone, you left me to this life and i keep fighting
a never ending battle
so i let that go in hope to be the one who inspires you + who looks up to me
but i might do
fall in this pit i’m climbing out of that i’ve always sunk to
i need a moment to breathe
my lungs don’t i agree i can’t, you
you judge me cause i’m not like you
i’m not as strong as you
i’m sorry that i’m weak and that depression is my fault
you’ve become the reason i always feel a need to get cut through
my wrist and watch the pain escape my body
i can’t bare the glimpse of blood
i used to be on knees, pleaded to god to save me but he didn’t
so i’ve come to accept pain is all i’m ever feeling
the pain’s so deep it’s even hard when breathing
sometimes i’m thinking that someday someone might love me just the way i’m needing
but depression’s twisting all i believe in
this can’t be life i’m living
what point is there to swimming out only to reach the shore then deeply sink in?
sometimes i feel like i’m not alive even though i’m breathing
like it’s a mistake my heart is still breathing
[verse 3]

momma told me everything happens for a reason
what i need right now is her and not the reason
said, “time is healing every wound”
why are mine still bleeding?
not a day passes without me planning on leaving this world
cigarettes inside my dressing drawer, i’m tryna cope
but in hope that my lungs explode whenever i hit a smoke
i just wish that i could fall down and die
don’t wanna live no more
i’m tired of rejection, being unloved and feeling alone
ice candie, i’m so sorry i can’t take it anymore
yg dynamo, i can’t make it anymore
i gave you all the most of me
and there’s nothing that’s left of me
sorry to my fans and those who’ve always cleft on me
i’ve been an inspiration to some, and now they plead me to live
i close my eyes and try to see what they plead me to see
cause i’ve been touching hearts and reaching out to people now sinking and i’m feeling like there’s not a single person that’s reaching to me

[verse 4]

the more i close my wound, the more that i’m bleeding too deep
i lost my confidence, i wish to see what you seeing in me
cause the feeling is deep
i try to overcome but not only is it k!lling me but k!lling what is living in me
still wish i had a real relationship with my granny
the one we had always drained me
they act as if i’m weak to have depression cause i’m phasing
tryna remain the same but i’m changing
don’t know who i’ve become and that sh+t drives me crazy
[verse 5]

i’m falling off my music
always dedicating my heart to the people who use me
i always wish to see the outcome if you were to lose me
like if i were to die right now
how many people would feel the way that i feel right now?
that’s the reason i can’t k!ll myself, i’m fighting for me
it’s always raining in my life, the sun is hiding from me
you said it’s childhood love
and you would love me forever, guess you were lying to me
seems like, “myself.” is the person i’m always trying to be
person i’ve never known
i need you to love me and love my heart like it’s your own
i need you to be here and guide me home
and if we get lost together, you’ll be my home cause i can’t do this on my own

[verse 6]

tears falling down my eyes when i talk my pain
i know i promised i won’t walk away
but i can not take it anymore, hope i’m forgiven for this course i’ll break
but now it’s time to walk away
time to walk away

[outro]

f+ck this sh+t

(pen scribbling across a page)
i’m done (tearing pages)

- raxion stance lyrics

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