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robert lopez & jeff marx - there is life outside your apartment lyrics

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[brian:]
princeton!

[princeton:]
yeah

[brian:]
listen, buddy, n0body’s seen ya for two weeks
what’s up with that?

[princeton:]
i went to work for a temp agency, and they
fired me for being too depressing on the phone
i maxed out my cards, i’m two months behind
in rent, i totally messed up my personal life
oh, and brian—i still haven’t found my purpose!

[brian:]
all right. get off your -ss and stop worrying!
everyone’s getting together to mess around the city today

[princeton:]
have fun!

[brian:]
when i say everyone, that includes you!
there is life outside your apartment
i know it’s hard to conceive
but there’s life outside your apartment
and you’re only gonna see it if you leave
there is cool sh-t to do
but it can’t come to you
and who knows, dude
you might even score!
there is life outside your apartment
but you’ve got to open the door!

[princeton:]
no, thanks, i’m staying in!

[brian:]
don’t tell me i gotta force you

[princeton:]
sorry!

[brian:]
all right, everyone! he’s resisting!

[christmas eve, trekkie monster, gary and nicky pick princeton up and drag him outside]

[all but princeton:]
there is life outside
there is life outside
there is life outside
there is life outside your apartment!
there’s a pigeon
squashed on the street

[christmas eve:]
ew

[brian:]
there’s a girl p-ssing by

[nicky:]
no i think it’s a guy

[all but princeton:]
and a homeless man
who only wants to
buy something to eat!
sorry, can’t help you

[they enter the subway]

we could go to the zoo!

[trekkie monster:]
pick up girls at nyu!

[brian:]
we could sit in the park smoking pot!

[christmas eve:]
or not

[all but princeton:]
there is life outside your apartment

[princeton:]
well, i guess i’ll give it a shot

[sound of gunshot. everyone screams and runs.]

[all:]
there is life outside your apartment
i know—

[sound of loud jackhammer. they cover their ears and swear.]

there is life outside your apartment

[they look up in horror.]

[voice #1:]
i’m gonna jump!

[all:]
don’t do it!

[voice #1:]
okay

[all:]
there is cool sh-t to do
but it can’t come to you
so come on—

[car screeches to a halt.]

[voice #2:]
get out of the way -ssh0l-!

[princeton:]
f-ck you!

[all:]
there is life outside your apartment
oh, you never know
what’s around the bend
you could win the lotto
or make a friend

[lucy enters. the guys eye her and turn to princeton.]

[guys:]
take her home to see your apartment!

[lucy:]
do you wanna feel special?
i can see that you do
well, i can make you feel
special
if you let me feel you

[guys:]
she’ll feel you!

[lucy:]
where’s your pad?

[princeton:]
not too far

[guys:]
we could call you a car

[princeton:]
we’ll be fine, thank you! see ya!

[christmas eve:]
hope you don’t get gonorrhea!

[all:]
there is life outside your apartment

[princeton/lucy:]
but now it’s time to go home

[all:]
there is life outside your apartment

[trekkie monster:]
me going home now

[princeton/lucy:]
it’s time to go home!

[trekkie monster:]
that’s where me gonna go!

[lucy:]
i can make you feel special

[trekkie monster:]
that’s where me gonna go!

[all:]
there is life outside your apartment

[trekkie monster:]
me going home now
that’s where me gonna go!

[princeton/lucy:]
but now it’s time to go home

[trekkie monster:]
for p-rn!

- robert lopez jeff marx lyrics

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