rubberbandits – bertie ahern lyrics
my mam has a new man called
he has a denim jacket and electric windows in his car
my mam has a new man called
he has a keyring of a woman with tits and it says ‘barcelona’ on it
my mam has a new man called
he is friends with the fella on the radio
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
me and him and mam went fishing, we couldn’t find shoes for mam so she went in her feet
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
she asked me if it would be okay if he stayed ovеr
i said that was okay and we watched a video
my bеst friend is called patrick, i am older than him
but he is bigger than me (he’s my best friend)
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
i saw him rub her bum, she saw me see
and he hasn’t been over for nearly one week now
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
he can push a f+g inside his ear and pull it out his mouth
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
he has a piece of hosepipe under his car seat with black sellotape on the end
one day i kicked patrick in the b+ll+cks
and mam got angry, so angry
and bertie ahern told me i shouldn’t do that
i told him to f+ck off, and then we both started laughing
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
he is strong and he says forward, even though mam says forward
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
once he picked me up from karate, and we listened to music that said ‘f+ck’ in it
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
one day i was under the stairs playing ‘men’, and i heard mam cry
bertie ahern said he would k!ll any man for her
and i believed him, and later we all went fishing
my mam has a new man called bertie ahern
one day he picked me up from karate and i asked him if i could call him dad
he said he’d like that, and started a small bit crying
but i know that’s ’cause he was happy, not sad
i want him to be proud of me
i need you to be proud of me
i want you to be proud of me
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