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ruby ibarra - beyoutiful lyrics

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i wanna be 5’5″ with brown eyes

big br–sts, small waist, and nice thighs

’cause i only see myself through your eyes

so i don’t eat, but i’m fed with more lies

so i try and i cry and i purge and i vomit

the urge to be honest with no courage to just stop it

i see society’s ideals, so i feel i need a shield

skipped another meal so i can keep my appeal

but my skin starts to peel so i can no longer feel

what it means to be real so i fall on these heels

’cause who cares about the frame that holds my diploma?

or the train of my thoughts that molds my persona?

or the way i’ve been brought up to be as a grown up?

but it’s the body’s frame, trained, by the way of society’s b-n-r

’cause i have to be 5’10” and in trend

and only feel good about the clothes that i’m in

experience defined by the beds i’ve climbed in

shadowed by a mask that i’m forced to hide in

of course i lie then, thinking each night i need to lie beside men

drinking each time my pride inside is rising

trying to find me but i’ve lost what i’ve been

who would’ve thought that it’s me that i fought each time, and

all at the cost of what i’ve become

when i look into the mirror i feel numb

staring back at me are supersized thighs, empty, hollow eyes

heart full of cries, brain filled with lies, body materialized, so i

nip and i tuck, i snip and i pluck

lips covered in muck, hips controlled by these cuffs

can’t stick to my gut, i’m fixed and i’m stuck

i’m tricked by this bluff ’till i’m sick and throw up

this sh-t is corrupt, i’m forced to grow up

can’t fit in this stuff, this change is abrupt

stick thin ain’t enough, must be thick with c-cups

tears drip as i rub off this make up that’s rough

society’s planted silicones so we end up being sickened clones

stuck in this cyclic flow of afflicted bones

so don’t let your sister know that she’s worth more than lipsticks and combs

or that her blisters will show everytime she vomits at home

when your parents aren’t home and she’s all alone

only seeing what these magazines and tv’s have shown

see i wanna be a cover girl, so i cover the real girl

but if you peel off these pearls, under’s a concealed world

of a girl with hopes and dreams, brighter than things that gleam

knows that she’s a queen, knows what her life means

’cause i can only be 5 feet with slanted eyes

geek and kinda shy, small feet and crooked smile, just me with no disguise

- ruby ibarra lyrics

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