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ryan scott oliver - caralee lyrics

[the “manny”]
caralee…
is a terror
but caralee…
(caralee, don’t suck on that)
pays the bills
(drop it. drop it. drop it.)
life as her manny
beats a life on my f-nny
still, caralee…
ugh! she k!lls
(spit. spit. spit. thank you.)

caralee has toy scissors
with which caralee makes msall cuts
now: you don’t try to take them
try to borrow or break them
and carlee
(goddammit!!!!)
stabs your nuts
(gently, but repeatedly.)

caralee, caralee, caralee
threw up and poo’d on my macbook
woah-oh-oh-oh

caralee knows the f-word
in fact, caralee wrote a song
it’s actually hilarious
in inappropriate areas-
like caralee
‘s father’s charity banquet
would be wrong
(and now we know.)

caralee, caralee, caralee
i think she might be satan
woah-oh-oh-oh
caralee, caralee, caralee
i swear to god, she is satan
woah-oh-oh-oh

caralee likes spaghetti
and caralee only likes spaghetti
spaghetti to eat with
and spaghetti to throw with
to get mush between feet with
to shout “h-m-” and “no” with
oh caralee
caralee-!

-is yours for thirty minutes
here’s fifty dollars. i’ll be right back
mister, caralee’s persuasive, she could help you sell your crack
of if you simply need to barter, she’s a very easy sale
but please don’t throw her in the trash or try to send her in the mail
because she’ll just come back to haunt you with her scissors and her smile
and it’s been awfully nice to meet you, thanks, and so long for a while
ha ha ha!
now i’m free
now i’m free
of caralee!

- ryan scott oliver lyrics

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