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sadboyprolific - i never knew what i meant to you lyrics

why do people leave?
actually why do i seek relief
in people who only mistreated me
love the sense of dependance and needing me
i’d give the ones that i love all the blood in my body
but never be seen as enough
i used to kick with my clique
never tripped bout a b+tch
heavy smoke in my lungs
now they just copy me
putting out music instead of pursuing the sh+t that they love
they haven’t seen all the sleepless nights i would stay up
or the times that i would write as i cut
i still have notebooks with pages and pages of verses
soaked all in my blood
conversations i had with myself and no one felt like giving a f+ck contemplations i had of just giving it up
one night i grabbed all my razors and sat there in silence
while holding the gun
thinking it won’t be so silent when everyone hears what i’ve done squeezed the trigger as hard as i could but the bullet was stuck etched 20 lines in my skin fell asleep and left life up to luck
i’m not scared of the dark anymore i’m in love with it
spent so much time in it i became one with it
i don’t ever wanna see the sun again
all i want is to be f+cking dead
leave me roses and violets inside of my coffin
a knife with an upside down cross and
blood dripping off it
an ounce with some vodka
make sure there’s a mosh pit
make sure that my moms in the middle getting stomped quick
for all the times she left me and my brother unconscious
high off the drugs coming off it

- sadboyprolific lyrics

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