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sain owumi - this is my pain lyrics

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all this pain in my head i be thinking about life like it’s not even fair
talking to my younger brother
with tear in his eyes
telling me
all the things wrong in his life
sorry you had to survive
wish i could of been there
wish we could of growed together
it’s not even fair
too my two younger brothers
i’m holding you down
if you ever need something i’m coming around
days i wasn’t around
just know that it’s never your fault
me and dad wasn’t talking l couldn’t see you
when i came down
saw how fast that you grew

thinking back now almost bring tears to my ears
knowing i couldn’t be there

how could i show you through life
i could showed you a lot man
it’s not even right
could
of
done more
should of put up a fight
thinking back now almost brings tears to my eyes
who’s gonna help you through life
so this is my life
i’m painting my story
i’m getting it right
can’t n0body else do it
it wouldn’t be right

i felt so alone for all of my life
as a kid
i would act out and i’ll fight
didn’t have much friends
i’ll mozy around
act like they act just trying to be down
then a kid from the city he moved on my block
we was only like 5
so we play and we talk
as we got we got older we drifted apart
would always be my brother we came from the start
ya
i
still remember the night that he died
i was like 20 in my room really high
then i heard gunshots and screams from outside
someone holding you on the ground with a shirt in your head
you was bleeding on the ground
then i’m holding your head

i’m sorry i let you down man

now i’m seeing flashbacks there blood on my hands
i still don’t feel
i did all that i can
so i just gotta say that i’m sorry again
man i just gotta that i’m sorry

so this is my pain every ounce of anguish that flows through my vain
sometimes the pressure to maintain it drives me insane
got deep issues in my brain that i never detained
all trapped in my subconscious it trigger again
so my self worth feels worthless again
feeling all alone and hopeless again
happens when your birth wasn’t planned
like
you an accident a mistake of a man

i was going to trying to rap this part
but
basically
it goes that
whenever man doesn’t have a plan god always has one
he knew you was going to be born before you were born
and he has a plan for your life a destiny for you to fulfl
he has a purpose for you to live out
and that’s what we doing right now
we bouta get it
just watch its proof it’s dead proof
god can fix the broken
you’re not a mistake not for god at least



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