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samtime - end of youtube song - coppa lyrics

(verse 1)
there’s a legal regulation
coming our way
best be careful
what you upload
and what you say
youtube got fined
$170 million
for tracking
the little kids
they stood up
took responsibility
and handballed it to me
handballed it to me (sh+t!)

(chorus 1)
coppa, coppa, coppa, coppa
coming to ruin the site
and creator’s lives
with the treat of
$42,000 fines
alright!
if you’re making kiddie content
better run for the hills
real fast (so fast!)
they’re gonna have your ass
hung and framed in glass
(verse 2)
didn’t you hear
the way it works
from now on
you must say
if your content
is for the young
you know it best
it’s your decision (thank you!)
that is unless (hey?)
we overrule (what?)
it’s no big deal
if we get it wrong
and mark it as “kids”
oh, there is one thing (hey!)
marking it “for kids”
will disable the comments too
your ad revenue (down 90%‽)
recommendations will be in the loo (aw cr+p!)
no notifications
so no one will know
that you’re gone (h+llo?)
or there’s anything wrong
did you know kids might
like this popular song (hey, don’t you dare!)
(bridge)
every day, i fight for survival (survival!)
from youtube’s robots
who think my content’s
for a child (demonetised!)
machine learning
is pretty stupid (so stupid!)
i think alan turing
would find that they’re useless

(spoken)
yeah
bit of a reference there
to an old mathematician
who made a test
to measure robot intelligence
we include such potentially boring content
for only one reason

(verse 3)
i need a plan
to show i ain’t kid friendly
please understand
i’m for adults
scare away the kiddies
by saying isosceles
and deciduous trees
mariah carey (so old!)
(chorus 2)
coppa, coppa, coppa, coppa
got me talking
like an old grandpa
which is trouble
’cause kids like dr. phil (yeah, he’s cool!)
wait this is stupid
i think i got a better way
make everyone happy
listen, it’ll make your kids even more safe
instead of marking videos
how ’bout we mark users as “kids”
and if they’re under 13
we wipe their info clean
and youtube will not track ’em
or deliver them targeted ads
wouldn’t that be rad
come on mum and dads (come on!)

(chorus 3)
coppa, coppa, coppa, coppa
doesn’t have to be so bad
just let ’em know
submit a comment
with the link down below (before the 9th!)
be calm, cool, collected
and explain what it means to you
and more importantly
what it means to me

(spoken)
save youtube everyone!
let the ftc know
the current guidelines
just don’t fly (cool!)

- samtime lyrics

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