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self critic - so long ago lyrics

[verse 1]

i woke up in the morning that beautiful sunny day
hopped on my computer impulsively right away
checking my email, i suddenly see this message
that’s about to break my heart fiercely piercing it with a blade
living in the united states, in my own fantasy
has its inconveniences when it comes to my family
i will never know what’s happening, if parents are battling
if my mother wants to warn me that my father is mad again
that i didn’t do the job, didn’t do what he asked me to
meaning he will absolutely do what he has to do
taking out his dissatisfaction and irritation
on my mom, and she paints me the reaction of his frustration
what’s pathetic is that i don’t even call
cause i’m afraid to face the problem, and i know it’s not small
so this message from my mother stated that she and my dad are getting separated
filing for divorce and no-one hesitated

[chorus]

broken hearts on the floor
every word you speak is quickly starting a war
when the person you used to love, you don’t love anymore
but you want everything to be like all was before
so you try to fix the error picking up the pace
but you cannot even look each other in the face
when the person you used to love, you don’t love anymore
but you want everything back like all was before, so long ago

[verse 2]

honestly i was scared
not necessarily for my mother not being well
but also for my selfish thoughts hating this situation
which i won’t even share, as i’m ashamed of my speculation
maybe after all it’s true what people frequently tell
that in the end the only person that you love is yourself
and based on it you make subconciously egotistic decisions
you conceitedly envision with an eagle-like precision
to find herself on a pilgrimage in portugal
to restore faith in life, cause day and night
she’d lay and cry looking for a way to die
demon within whispered her to leap into wind
convinced her it’s a venial sin to leave on a whim
but images of me and her kin deep in her skin
reached her and made her start believing again

[chorus]

- self critic lyrics

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