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sicklonely - first place lyrics

[hook]
why you doin music?
why you wanna rap?

[verse]
i been thinkin this a while now
how the rappin start out?
was a way to vent really helped me calm down
i didn’t tell n0body its been my only real hobby for a while now
let me take you to the start
yeah i was pretty scarred
started doin music heal the pain in my heart
id rap to myself when i sat in the dark
i was 16 when i wrote my first bars
now this sh+t taken off a bit
man i never quit
but my thoughts keep movin
they never sit
they tend to build me up
just to beat me down
mal intent these doubts are malevolent
back in school was a shy kid didn’t want no photos taken
lived in h+ll and i felt like that my soul was taken
then i found the pencil and pad
and people round me told me go and get it your mad i can’t believe you can rap
so i did it and i got my sh+t on lock uh
couple hundred fans had me feeling like a boss
but the couple last months ive been feelin real lost
got me thinking to myself i will never reach the top but..
that was not part of the plan in the first place
when i write lyrics i think in the worst way
my life was blessed but i think that a curse placed
all this face value there’s no need for wordplay
[hook]
why you doin music?
why you wanna rap?

[bridge]
wipe my eyes
try to clear my vision
no real orders
but im on a mission
hit record
try to speak some wisdom
got so much more
so i wipe my eyes
try to clear my vision
got no real orders
but im on a mission
so it hit record
try to speak some wisdom
got so much more

[verse]
man i hope that you listen the stories that i jot down
not the one thats crazy fabricated that had got round
going mental lately ive been thinking f+ck it what now
life got me in a chokehold but i still haven’t tapped out
still haven’t given up
i might be down
but i still wanna live it up
time stand still so im still young but i hate the old me
and i quit but
i still wanna hit a blunt
but ive grown a little bit so i dont deal with the nuisance
and im not broke so i dont need your two cents
my emotions arent real then please tell me whos is
lost myself at since 16 been tying up a noose since
im sorry that i deviated from my story
still get flashbacks when i see midori
tend to always back track man my mind is down bad
ain’t no joint so these memories can’t pass that
yeah, had to remind myself why i made music in the first place
gotta leave a legacy for my he+rs+ day
try to remove all the hurt placed
sicklonely
[hook]
why you doin music?
why you wanna rap?

- sicklonely lyrics

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