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slaves of the feeling - i don't have a boyfriend (demo) lyrics

[verse 1]
i wish i was drew in 50 first dates
but i can’t re+do that thursday afternoon when you and i met
i couldn’t get it out of my head
it was me against all your friends
they never really liked me in the first place
you didn’t even care to defend me, told them i was just a phase
mr. afraid of commitment
i was scared you would leave me, so i’d go with everything you said
maybe it’s cheating, maybe it isn’t
i’m sorry i’m selfish and don’t know how to share

[pre+chorus]
just like my mother, it was the b+tterfly еffect
and just like my father, you got caught in thе act
i bet you hardly remember it but i still see it in my nightmares

[chorus]
i remember all the texts you sent
and how bad it was at the end
when i made you choose between me and him
you’ll never understand how much it meant to me
that you were never romantic
and i fell in love with somebody who didn’t even exist
i think about as i get old, i don’t know why i’m still hurting
all the chaos you could’ve avoided
but instead you just said, ”i don’t have a boyfriend”
[verse 2]
i should be living in the present
but how could i not feel resentment
when you left me to marinate in hate
all you had to say was, ”you were never my friend”
now i have to deal with emotional damage
i think i need anger management
i’m still bitter, there’s a chip on my shoulder
and i’m going down with the titanic

[verse 3]
you made his name your password
and when i asked, you didn’t said a word
i could never let go before you told me it was over
you are a lesson that i never learned
i keep accepting the love i think i deserve
all because i didn’t get closure

[chorus]
i remember all the texts you sent
and how bad it was at the end
when i made you choose between me and him
you’ll never understand how much it meant to me
that you were never romantic
and i fell in love with somebody who didn’t even exist
i think about as i get old, i don’t know why i’m still hurting
all the chaos you could’ve avoided
but instead you just said, ”i don’t have a boyfriend”
[bridge]
i ignored when gabriel told me
i should’ve probably listened to zoey
everyone knew it, everyone but me
i’ve never had my heart broken
you were the first to rip me open
and i was always the last to know everything

[chorus]
you’ll never understand how much it meant to me
that you were never romantic
and now i can’t believe someone is not pretending
when they say i’m beautiful, it gets worse as i get old
you’re the reason why i still get nervous
all the trauma left unspoken
instead you just said, ”i don’t have a boyfriend”

- slaves of the feeling lyrics

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