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solo for dolo - trauma bonds lyrics

lately i often wonder if i ever had a chance…
just a product of divorce who flew off of his path
got caught up in a town that made me less than last
just a dreaded scapegoat but i sh+tted right back…
remember in kindergarten when i met this girl vanessa
who would let me chase her around, and want to let me play whatever
as long as occasionally she could kiss me, id say whatever…
didn’t realize at home, she was under older pressurе…
so by proxy, i was welcomed into a world full of error
and had somеhow as a young boy learned to play protector
we never committed, but were friends until she moved
too bad before she moved, she was the first girl with b00bs
she got harassed by this kid, so i laid him out flat…
he wound up doing a bid for stabbing a kid in the back…
she moved to elizabeth too bad never came back…
and by the time i looked her up, she had already passed…

and i never said that sh+t out loud…
but it feels good to get up off my chest…
im trying to free my life up some this stress
maybe this time ill finally put the past to rest…
( dont hurt me again nah dont hurt me again )

maybe the sting of that one made me duck commitment…
or maybe the replacements weren’t fitting her description…
needed a sick girl… not well adjusted b+tches…
i only chased the nymphos… the ones who harbored all inflictions
eventually i started finding the ones before the wisdom
the muses by the night who helped me feed into my symptoms…
by junior year in high school i looked for more commitment…
relationship for a show, just like jada and will smith did
started going on tours… mostly toured other women…
spent time with socialites, and models and lesbians…
came back to a place i never fit in…
a cog when the machine but the wheels were f+ckin missing…
i seen through the system with people who ran the system…
when you realize blood lines what keeping yall positioned
there’s nothing you gun do to f+ckin keep me off my mission
im trying to muster up the words to get this past a billion
and i never said that sh+t out loud…
but it feels good to get up off my chest…
im trying to free my life up some this stress
maybe this time ill finally put the past to rest…
( dont hurt me again nah dont hurt me again )

dont ever trust the ones that profit off your sadness
that motivated greed, that thing that got you on this planet
that depression algorithm that got you off of your axis
sitting sideways on that infinite sorrow and there you have it…
looking back… most my shorties wwew trauma bonds…
binded by this bleek state of mind that we rode along…
felt forgotten by the world unless sh+t upon…
yet everybody still had the time to tell us what we were doing wrong…
that hypocritic sh+t that i spit upon…
only felt control in life when i could write these songs…
i wrote my f+cking life in these pages, left my soul on these stages…
just to get told it wasn’t enough, i never claimed it…
the only place i ever had a voice was on the stage b+tch
id have lost my f+ckin mind and place up in this matrix…
who’d a f+ckin thought id grow up to feel the same sh+t…
full circle… just like the end of my name b+tch…

- solo for dolo lyrics

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