sopor aeternus - the simple joys of maidenhood lyrics
the simple joys of maidenhood
where the exit-door leads in
he scrutinises circling clockwise
counting two out of the three
slightly above the first degree
“has there been blood?”
he asks politely as once a year we do explore
with my head resting on the pillow
gateways towards
plutonian sh-r-s
some are caused by downward pressure
so don’t strain when opening bowels
the simple joys of maidenhood
the red-eyed fox is on the prowl
rubber-bands for arteries
these indian seeds do soak like flees
reduce the use of salts and lose some weight
walk half an hour every day
i openly dislike your vagueness
in handling hours we appoint
but when you choose
your pr-nouns rightly
i do silently rejoice
some are caused by downward pressure
so don’t strain when opening bowels
the simple joys of maidenhood
the red-eyed fox is on the prowl
so listen closely girls and boys
this song is about hemorrhoids
not anyone’s but mine of course
a secret part i now disclose
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