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south park - prostitute song lyrics

chef: h-llo there, children!
children: hey, chef
stan: chef, what’s a prost-tute?
chef:dag-nabbit children! how come every time you come in here
you gotta be askin’ me questons that i shouldn’t be answering?!
“chef, what’s the cl-toris?” “what’s a lesbian, chef?” “how come they
call it a rim jub, chef?” for once, can’t just come in here and say,
“hi chef. nice day, isn’t it?”
stan: hi chef. nice day, isn’t it?
chef: it sure is! thank you.
stan: chef, what’s a prost-tute?
chef: uh uh! you children are gonna get me in trouble with the princ-p-l again.
cartman: lunchtime! i’m starved!
chef: oh my god. eric?
cartman: that’s me.
stan: chef was just about to tell us what a prot-tute is.
chef: why do you need to know what a prost-tue is anyway?!
stan: because jesus told us that kenny’s a prost-tute. is he?
kenny: yeah. am i?
chef: well, no, uh of course kenny is not a prost-tute.
kyle: why?
chef: well, because, children, a prost-tute is someone who…
you could pay for certain services.
stan: like what?
chef: like keeping you company. understand?
stan: no.
chef: you see, chidren, sometimes a man needs to be with a woman.
but sometimes, when the lovin’ is over, the woman just wants to talk and talk
and talk and talk.

[song]
but a prost-tute is someone who would love you
no matter who you are, or what you look like.
yes, it’s true, children.
that’s not why you pay a prost-tute,
no, you don’t pay her to stay, you pay her to leave afterwards.
that’s why i pays a lot for prost-tutes! ladies and gentlemen, mr. james taylor.

james taylor: a prost-tute is like any other woman
they all trade somethin’ for s-x and they do it well.
chef: and that’s why i say-
chef and james taylor: prost-tutes! prost-tutes! they-
chef: oohhhh [sees princ-p-l]
james taylor, what the h-ll are you doin’ in here?!
singing’ about prost-tutes to the children! get out of here!

- south park lyrics

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