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spitting image - safe viewing lyrics

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(intro)
tsk tsk tsk tsk
+phone rings+ h+llo?

(verse 1)
can romeo kiss juliet? well, if it’s in good taste
i think i can allow it, but not below the waist!
you want to show “last tango”, eh? well, that sounds rather hot
i hope you can assure me the b+tter’s out of shot!
a drama that is biblical? yes i’ll give that the nod
but don’t suggest that mary had messed around with god!

(chorus 1)
but don’t suggest that mary has messed around with god!
he knows what’s acceptable, he knows what’s obscene
he’ll never let a p+n+s penetrate your screen!
no groping, no scr+w+ng
uncle william offers you safe viewing!

(bridge)
+ahem+ there we are, no chance of catching anything from that
+phone rings+ h+llo? oh!

(verse 2)
“gorillas in the mist” you say? she sounds extremely sick!
i’ll let it pass provided the mist is very thick!
a derek jarman video? i don’t that will shock
i met a man who told me it’s all a load of c+ck
the tales of “madame bovary”? now, that’s a definite no!
the only gaelic classic is called “‘allo ‘allo!”
(chorus 2)
the only gaelic classic is called “‘allo ‘allo”
he knows what’s acceptable for boring old farts!
he won’t permit a close+up of your private parts!
no groping, no scr+w+ng!
uncle william offers you safe viewing!



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