starbomb - mega marital problems lyrics
h-llo, mega man. and mrs. mega man.
welcome to couples’ therapy. i’m dr. wily.
dr. wily? you’re a therapist now?
but you’re evil, and bent on world domination!
not anymore. those days are behind me.
don’t question it! shut up. just tell me the problem over this hot beat.
okay…
(music)
well you see, doc, i got a pretty nice life
a mega house with two kids, and a hot mega wife
but i got a little problem with my android bride
when it comes to making love, she’s never satisfied
we’ve been f-cking for decades! s-x has gotten routine!
we gotta spice that sh-t up, i’m not a total machine!
i’m sick of all the romance, and the cuddles, and the love
it’s time to get dirty and do all the weird stuff!
it would be seeming to me that the problem here
is you don’t listen to your wife, she is being clear
but she says the same thing, like a tape recorder!
quiet! the doctor is talking — there must be order!
…sorry, i’m not evil anymore.
you must beat the robot masters to acquire skills
and then use them on your wife when she is getting drilled
maybe she likes shocks from elec man’s beam
or getting burnt by fireb-lls; she’s a freaky man’s dream
is that what you want, hon? a robot master?
get out and do it, you stupid b-st-rd!
your marriage will be happy like pure springwater
now leave my office before you are slaughtered!
fine, i’ll kick -ss if it saves my marriage
for the satisfaction of my lady’s undercarriage
first i’ll take on fire man, not much of a test
oh, your weakness is ice? i woulda never f-cking guessed.
now ice man is here, this shouldn’t take up too much time
oh, is your weakness fire? you just blew my f-cking mind.
i cut cut man and he’s gonna need st-tches
bomb and elec man just went down like little b-tches
wait, you douchebag, i’m gonna end your life
i am mega man zero, and i’m here to plow your wife
i bring s-x moves from the future, and my skills are vast
like my super double ultra mega nutbuster c-mblast (oh!)
women can’t resist my blonde flowing locks
i’ll slap a stamp right on my package and deliver your wife the c-ck
my shining armor is red, the color of victory
while your fruity suit is blue, like your b-lls will soon be
(spoken)
wait! what are you doing…?
mega d-ck… activate!
(music)
so mega man harnessed all the powers of the masters
and killed zero with his mega laser schl-ng-blaster
and then he banged his wife until she screamed “yes! more!”
then she loved him again, ’cause she’s a shallow wh-r-
(spoken)
sorry, that was misogynistic.
she is a wh-r-, though.
what did you say?!
nothing!
…douche.
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