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starbomb - this song sucks lyrics

[intro]
yo, egoraptor!
‘sup, danny?
this is the last song of what might be the last starbomb alb-m, which means we’ve gotta bring it!
a’ight, let’s go through our rejected song ideas that we never used and find a winner
h-ll yeah!

[verse 1]
[danny]:
what about a song where eggman cooks eggs
that are poisoned and designed to paralyze sonic’s legs?
[arin]:
or a rap about b-tts, called -ss–ss-in’s creed?
[danny]:
or final fantasy 50: the really, really final fantasy?
[arin]:
a smash game where no one fights ’cause they’re all too busy clappin’
silent hill’s a game about a hill where nothin’ happens
[danny]:
or the new chokèmon game that’s now sweeping the nation
about squirtle trying autoerotic asphyxiation, baby!
[arin]:
what about that thing like, where you’re on yoshi’s back-
[danny]:
no, you suggest this every alb-m…
[arin]:
hey, just give me a sec!
and you’re falling in a pit, and you have to jump away
and yoshi-
[danny]:
falls and dies-
[arin]:
it’s really funny, okay?!

[chorus]
[danny]:
this is usually the part where i sing the chorus out
but we haven’t established what this song is all about!
[arin]:
then i chime in real quick, for just a second
as the character delivers a line that reminds us of the joke
[danny]:
and i’ll respond with harmonies, isn’t that dope?

[verse 2]
[danny]:
maybe a resident evil wherein the t-virus mutates
into the d-virus that makes all the zombies m-st-rb-t-
[arin]:
sonic runs and breaks out of the tv like an acrobat
and ends up in the real world where he’s f-cked by a housecat
[danny]:
a bathroom where the toilet is a portal instead-
[arin]:
-with another on the ceiling so you’ll p–p on your head!
[danny]:
an mmo where you’re a prost-tute – world of wh-r-craft!
[arin]:
how about kingdom farts… pause for laugh
[arin]:
bomberman goes through the tsa, and you can guess the rest
or how about if kirby eats his foes and actually digests?
[danny]:
grand theft auto but you’re in a neverending traffic jam!
[arin]:
sonic boom!
[danny]:
where’s the joke?
[arin]:
that is the joke!
[both]:
oh d-mn!

[chorus]
[danny]:
this is where the song concept should heighten for effect!
if you think we use that formula a lot, you are correct!
arin should come back in now, but he’s busy eating lunch!
so i’ll just end the chorus with something funny that rhymes

[verse 3]
[arin]:
sonic runs so fast, that he keeps on hitting things
all his bones start to shatter as he’s flashing, sh-tting rings
he ends up in the er, where his legs get amputated
he learns to run on his hands
this is the stupidest thing i’ve ever said…
[danny]:
a mortal kombat game where all the deaths are canon, so there’s only 2 guys left!
[arin]:
ooh! what about if ganon-
[danny]:
ugh…
[arin]:
-was riding on a yoshi, and then falls into a pit-
[danny]:
the splatoon field janitor decides he’s had enough and quits!
[arin]:
wait, i think i’ve got it!
[danny]:
lay it on me, g*nius rapper!
[arin]:
what if mario rode yoshi and then fell into a-
[danny]:
no!

[outro]
[danny]: here’s when brian likes when sound effects get introduced
but we used our money on that fart from alb-m two!
to bring this record home, we need one more g*nius breakthrough
so now enjoy as we auto-tune that fart ten times for you!

- starbomb lyrics

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