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steve terreberry - love songs gone terribly wrong! lyrics

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love songs gone terribly wrong! lyrics
[advertis+m+nt]
the video starts off with an ad for ‘omaze’. omaze is a website that gives away prizes that give money to select charities such as ‘after+school all+stars’ which was founded by arnold schwarzenegger in 1992. if you would like to hear more, go to stevie’s video in the url given, or go to his youtube channel
[end of ad]

[waiting music, steve raises eyebrows at girlfriend]

[girl]
shut up!

[steve]
+smiles and nods+

[girl]
serenade me!

[steve}
yeah…haha, yeah!

[girl]
+clapping+

[steve (last resort + papa roach)]
cut my wife into pieces
with a serrated sword!
cut and slicing, and dice her
oh, but first, can you make me some supper?
ner+ner+ner+ner+nernеrnernerner+
[girl]
no! that’s not a lovе song!
play me a love song with your acoustic!

[steve]
o+oh, yeah.. sorry about that babe!

[steve (the only exception + paramore)]
and you +cr+ps self+
are.. the only exception and you +diarrheas self+
don’t give me erections

[girl]
that’s freaking discussing!

[steve]
well, i thought you liked love songs!

[girl]
i wanted songs from the heart, not songs from the shart!

[steve (all+4+one + and i swear)]
and i swear~..
that the moon is as big as your thighs
and i swear~..
that my girlfriend is really a guy, with fake hair
[girl]
don’t touch me!

[steve (continuing)]
i should have swiped left
your face looks like your b+tt..
i’m sorry but you will never make me +++
and i swear~…

[girl]
skip!

[steve (john legend + all of me)
cause all of me is like half of you
i caught most of your infections..
just wish you would trim your downstairs hedges

[girl]
+gasp+

[steve (i don’t know this song)]
lady in blue, she stands when she pees..
i saw her last night, she’s more well+hung than me!
oh, what a sight to see!
i’ll never forget, her ass is hairier than mine!
[girl]
can you play photograph?

[steve (photograph + nickelback)]
oh yeah, sure babe!
look at this photograph
every time i do it makes me laugh
when did your eyes get so big?
two years ago, we should have burned that wig!

[girl]
no! i meant photograph by ed sheeran!

[steve (photograph + ed sheeran)]
oh, haha, right, sorry babe!
don’t go changing the radio station, when we’re driving in the car. mhmhmh~
it’s my medal playlist..
and if you don’t like it?
you can buy your own d+mn car!

[girl]
yeah, yeah, sorry i don’t like your dr+dreamtheatre!
that stupid dreamtheatre song lasted the entire seven minutes to the gas station!

[steve (another song i don’t know)]
th+yeah, and we almost made it through the intro!
passin’ shart
that’s your only sk!ll
stop before
you make me feel sickly ill!
that’s some shart!

[girl]
i’m too young to know that song, skiiiip!

[steve (kiss on my list + daryl hall & john oates)
because my fist, my fist, is all you kiss
because my fist, my fist, is on my wrist
because my fist is all you kiss when i turn off the lights!

[girl]
so that’s why your lips taste like knuckle!

[steve (maybe i didn’t love you + willie nelson)]
maybe i didn’t punch you quite as hard as i should!
and baby i wasn’t honest, you never gave me ++++
your eyes are like the nipples on your br++sts
the right one always looks inside!
your eyes and nipples aren’t aligned
and that is all that’s on my mind

[girl]
oh yeah, because your eyes are so perfectly aligned!

[steve (i will do anything for love + meat loaf)]
and i would do anything for love
i just wish you would shave your back
and i would do anything for love..

[a moment of silence]
but i won’t do that

[girl]
won’t do that? right, right
well if you don’t need me anymore, i guess i’ll be on my way, bye!

[steve]
well, babe, i wasn’t done!

[girl]
bye, bye forever
thanks for the memories!

[steve]
oh, you want me to sing you a country song!
come on, come on, come on, come on!
i+ hahah..
yeah, i f+, i forgot the lyrics, babe..

[girl]
do that again and i will threaten you

[steve (lonestar + amazed)]
i don’t know why you do what you do
out of ten you are a two if you’re wearing a paper bag
i don’t know what to do with my life
you haven’t changed your shirt since two+thousand+and+five!
and you’re a bed wetter!

[girl]
skip!

[steve (again, i don’t know)]
i think that if we had a baby
i’d probably drown it in the sink oh yeah+yeah!
i’d have to stay with you forever!
you would take my car and house

[girl]
>:(
s k i p!

[steve (wonderwall + oasis)]
i said maybe
your skin is dry, and blemishy, and pasty!

[girl]
skip!

[steve (sorry, i think i’m dumb or something)]
baby!
i could [ ? ] taylor swift with a beard
oh~ the more i look at you the sicker i get!

[girl]
bye! i’m leaving, goodbye. +drops something+

[steve (continuing)]
and now that your ass is in view
i might leave the room and throw up.. +gags+
wait, no+no+no+no, babe!

[girl]
no, i’m leaving for good this time!

[steve]
baabe!

[girl]
have fun being alone by the way, you’ll never get a girlfriend!

[steve]
babe.. i love you

[girl]
i don’t care!

[steve]
i haven’t played you your favorite song yet, you can’t just+
give me one more chance, oh, come+, mwah, mwah, mwah, come on, one more chance!

[girl]
this is your last chance!

[steve]
one more chance, i promise this time, i’ll sing+ i’ll sing good this time. i promise

[girl]
well then, favorite song, please!

[steve (have i told you lately? + van morrison)]
have i told you lately?

[silence again]
++++ you!

[girl]
yup, yup, yup!

[steve (continuing)]
have i told you, there’s a few people above you?

- steve terreberry lyrics

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