steve vai - the reaper rap lyrics
bill: i’m bill s. preston, esq.! and this is ted “theodore” logan!
b&t: and we are wyld stallyns!
denomolos: i am denomolos. now . . . what is your mission?
evil bill: first we totally k!ll bill and ted!
evil ted: yeah, then we take over their lives
evil bill: he’s totally a robot!
evil ted: so are you, dude!
evil bill: whoa, we’re total metalheads!
denomolos: destroy that ridiculous, insipid band!
evil b&t: death to bill and ted!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
denomolos: you fools! are we ready?
reaper: get down with your bad self!
denomolos: you fools!
evil b&t: yeah, totally!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
denomolos: you fools! are we ready?
evil ted: i’ve got a full on robot chubby
evil b&t: how’s it goin’, bill and ted?
bill: ted . . . it’s us again!
ted: whoa!
bill: you’re metal, dude!
evil bill: i know! check it out! we’re totally gonna k!ll you now!
b&t: whoa . .
evil bill: ha ha ha!
ted: dudes, even though you’re doing this, we . . . we . .
bill: we love you!
evil bill and ted: f-gs!
bill: you d-ck, bill!
evil bill: i know! let’s waste ’em
bill and ted: aaaahhhhh!!!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
rufus: bogus
evil bill: stellar, evil ted!
b&t: no way!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
rufus: bogus
bill: yeah!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
rufus: bogus
evil bill: stellar, evil ted!
b&t: no way!
evil bill: i totally loogied on that good, dead me!
ted: bill, what happened?
bill: ted, we’re dead, dude!
b&t: whoa!
ted: who are you?
bill: ted, it’s the grim reaper, dude!
ted: oh. how’s it hangin’, death? we’ve got to get back to the babes!
bill: ted, we can’t . . . we’re dead, dude!
ted: we’ve got to stop those evil us’s! we’ve gotta try!
bill: but how?
b&t: melvin!
reaper: they melvined me!
ted: dude, i totally broke a rock!-
bill: excellent!-
ted: i kinda like this- . . . who’s that?
bill: ted, who do you think it is?
ted: how’s it goin’, beelzebub? excellent rocks!-
bill: we totally broke some.-
ted: okay, can we go now?
b&t: whoa!
bill: thanks dude! you know, you’ve got a bad rap
colonel oates: gentlemen! welcome to h-ll!
ted: dude
bill: what?
ted: i think we’re in our own personal h-ll!
easter bunny: you stole deacon’s easter basket!
little ted: no way!
granny s. preston, esq: how about a kiss?
little bill: bogus!
bill: you ugly red source of all evil!
granny s. preston, esq: all i want is one! right on the lips!
colonel oates: get back here!
b&t: ahhhhhh!!!!!! whoaaaaa!!!!!!!
bill: that was non-non-non-non heinous!
evil bill: you suck, dude!-
bill: do something else, dude!-
ted: yeah!-
bill: not bad, dude!
b&t: excellent!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
bill inside sergeant: whoa, donuts!
ted inside captain logan: i totally possessed my dad!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
ted inside captain logan: excellent!
bill inside sergeant: i totally believe you, dude!
reaper: get down with your bad self!
bill inside sergeant: whoa, donuts!
ted inside captain logan: i totally possessed my dad!
bill: you totally k!lled us, you evil metal d-ckweed!
evil bill: that’s right, lesser developed human prototype us’s!-
bill: let’s get ’em, ted!-
ted: ahhhhh, yeah, no!-
colonel oates: get ’em granny!-
b&t: we’ve got to face them.-
colonel oates: now get going!-
various moans and groans of fears being defeated.-
bill: kiss your fears, dudes!-
ted: or offer ’em a honeybun or something. and they’ll get smaller and maybe they’ll even go away!-
bill: yeah, they’re not that bad, dude. so don’t get programmed by anybody but yourself!-
b&t: let’s rock!-
rufus: and most important, do not do your homework without wearing headphones!
evil b&t: catch you later, bill & ted!
colonel oates crying.-
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