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sunlight2003 - we were only... lyrics

intro [producer tag]:
sena made it!

verse 1 [sun light]:
might sound like a broken record playing over
but once again we’re going back in time to that year
rewind the tape, we’re 10, 2013 again
a million times i’ve thought of coming back here
divorce in the family, forced into insanity
of course that’s the way that i discovered this poetry
locked in my room confused, thinking of tunes to use
writing my views but dude, i didn’t know her story
her history at that time consisted of abuse
hеr stepdad knew what he was doing, hе used to use
doobs and joints lit up in the back room
threw things across the house and leave his wife with a bruise
but for this girl it was h+ll, everyone finished supper
they’d go to bed and then he’d pounce and take advantage of her
he’d put the blanket on and take her frickin’ panties off her
caress her hair and say he loves her man and then he’d touch her
chorus 1 [sun light]:
and we were 10, 10
we were only 10, 10
we were only 10, 10
we were only 10 (10, 10)

verse 2 [sun light]:
it’s 2018, i’m depressed, i’m on prescribed pills
the things i’d been through as a child done made my mind ill
the countless times my mother had to call for help
from my brother or her brothers because i was such a wild thrill
i started on the lowest dose, just enough to keep my psych still
at one point had to double it because i’m suicidal
the things i’d put my family through had taken tolls on me
guess i couldn’t live with all the vibes that i’d k!lled
switch to her, she’s out the situation, yea, he’s locked up
her mother came home early one day and saw what he’d done
but now she’s left to deal with all the repercussions of his actions
trying to turn to other people but she only found one
who helped her through the pain and stress, she would become a friend
until that friend decided she’d rather be in the mother land
and couldn’t deal with her own life, had to take it away
and now her and i are all alone again

chorus 2 [sun light]:
and we were only 15, 15
we were only 15, 15
we were only 15, 15
we were only 15 (teen, teen)
verse 3 [sun light]:
guzzling shots and dealing with some troublesome thoughts
just graduated and moved out with the honours i’ve got
her and i had moved up to the city, couple of blocks
from where her father lived, but me? i was caught in a shock
just came off my medication, moving far away from home
and i’m surrounded by her family but still feel all alone
and all i’ve got to work with here is this pen and microphone
and a cr+ppy training period of work at domino’s
nothing going for me, spent so long just tryna make it to this point
now it’s like no point, my schedules broken and i feel annoyed
writing pretty often and i want to just destroy a beat
release it on the net to let you see what i’ve been doing
it’s so hard to get into the zone, drive down to the park and stop the car
pull the pen out and just write another bar
i’m not feeling it, i scribble it out and scrunch it up, toss it far
and buckle up returning home and now it’s dark
see i spent my whole life in a really small town
as a child, finished school, celebrated, all smiles
now i’m up here in the city where i want to be
but i can’t admit to myself that i’m watching myself fall down
i know i’ve got all types of people here that i can call now
but without my core friends, things are hard to sort out
back at home i’m pretty sure i had it figured all out
and i had the key but dropped it as i went to walk out
now i’m in the dark, with just my phone torch on
tryna convince myself that i’m fine but i know it’s all gone
all i’ve got is the ability to compose more songs
so here i am, pen in hand like it’s a bone saw
i’m tryna create my own wave but the current is against me
my ship is sinking, close my eyes, somehow i’m still drifting
i can’t give up, there’s people that depend on me existing
i gotta snap up out of it, stop feeling so empty
where’s the motivation that i had? is it still inside me deep down?
i reach out, if you can hear me, please shout
a faint whisper, i’m determined, let him creep out
his hole and take my mind again like consciousness in freestyles
reminds me of a flow state the way that you get lost in it
i had the drive to get it done and all of it was authentic
there’s got to be a way to get it back into my thought bin
and if that ever happens then my friends and i are all winning
my core mission is to find peace in the cage that i’m caught in
and enjoy it so much that i’m not caught in it
not see all the people around me as fraudulent
all have our strengths and weaknesses that have been god+given
no better than you in terms of where we’re gonna all finish
but i hope to cement my legacy, right now i’m carving it
her and i we had our struggles, but man, don’t we all when it
comes to living together, tessellating in harmony
i don’t blame us, we’ve been to h+ll and back
and haven’t left each other, we’re both strong and i’m telling facts
maybe my love for you gets clouded when i’m bout to k!ll a track
but we’ll get through it, look how far we’ve come as people from our past
chorus 3 [sun light]:
19, 19
yea, we’re only 19, 19
yea, we’re only 19, 19
yea, we’re only 19 (teen, teen)

- sunlight2003 lyrics

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