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sur5ill - the layoff lyrics

[hook]
wish they would lay me off, severance pay me off
getting fired or quit? man, i should weigh these op-tions
i think it would be so awe-some
i would just sit around and play xbox one
wish they would lay me off, severance pay me off
i’m at a crossroad, i hate my shady boss

[verse 1]
alright, i’ve had to go hr for so many cases the race card
was played in my favor, i won’t belabor that
i’m no saint y’all
yeah, ‘cuz i don’t play in the superdome with a faceguard
nor a clipboard where it stores the laminated play charts
i’m just an office b-tch, let me come down from my podium
i’m not far from a janitor, chappelle would say a custodian
and the sh-t is garbage, pardon my french–napoleon
i work 60% of the time like s-x panther by odeon
i feel the the same guy that hired me conspires to fire me
when he smiles in the corridor it feels like a giant lie to me
grinning ear to ear all cheshire-y in his piety
i want to say things to him that require parental advisory
i hate him with every fiber inside of me
constant b-tt-ins or weigh-ins from his tower of keenan ivory
one of us has to go in order to end this rivalry
this song is a prime example of how i wouldn’t go quietly

[hook](x2)

[verse 2]
(yeah) sharing craig’s traits, fired on my day off, cutting dead weight
been getting out of bed late and not having my head straight
third day in a row i’ve been delayed by a half hour
and not showered i’m not a morning person like matt lauer
they’re probably losing clout having scouted a dumb hire
in the past month alone, i’ve called out more than umpires
my att-tude includes not being amused, i’m unhappy
this probably caused me to slack off like removing my khakis
at ten til noon some ginger dude set up the exit interview
impending doom; used it as a forum to merit my ridicule
they weren’t going to wait around for me to blow up like inner tubes
apparently my behavior was raising red flags like liverpool
terminated like some vermin worm-related serpent pagan
merlin magic nerdy laden person in an urban haven
office b-tch working maiden patient zero, zero patience
they made me print here and make sure of my cursive placement

[hook](x2)

[verse 3]
(ok) i’m in a pickle now, i hope those wealthy tax dollars trickle down
how am i socialist because i pulled my hammer and sickle out?
a memorandum was sent around, my dismissal’s official now
i’ll celebrate within my house and fill my mouth with triple stout
the third year in a row where management stole our bonuses
greed is the only m.o. that the shareholders voted in
i could have given my notice not that anyone would have noticed it
i was jaded but acting devoted is how i coded it
as i pack my desk my coworkers all stick their noses in
and show their face to sur with fake concern but the motive is
get promoted to my job so they check the site that hosted it
they posted it faster than their web browsers could reload the sh-t
the next act to hurry me did show their maturity step forth
bridge is burning me as they ensure i leave–security escort
walked me out and took my badge, nah, i wasn’t looking sad
glad to be kaput now i can make a bigger push to rap (work)

- sur5ill lyrics

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