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surgeon (us) - clown baby lyrics

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look down on me
i don’t care anymore
you don’t know me
only stories

nowadays
people portray
their face
in two completely different ways

i don’t know you
but that’s okay
because i don’t want to

no games and no f+cking excuse
the endless days of abuse have me so used to being used
looking back it was all that i knew
so it makes sense why i trusted you

you think i didn’t know
you were listening to close
not to sympathize
but to solidify your roll
step by step following the ghost
on your pedestal
but you wantеd the throne
narcissistic jealousy
is all that i еver see
so obsessed with being seen
no matter what it means

look at me
look at me
another clown baby
not a thought
left to think
just another
just another slave to the screen

if i carve
my heart out of my chest
pour my soul onto the floor
and sacrifice this vessel
then will they
remember me?

how many blades
can one spine take
before trust
doesn’t just break
but all
falls apart?
descending into
never ending dark
sworn to solitude
thoughts i can’t exclude
and for all of what you have done to me
i would like to say “thank you”

without the way
you would spit in my face
and portray my name as if i was to blame
for the faults of your own
i suffered alone
but it let me know
all i do is grow



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