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synapse540 - years go by lyrics

[verse 1: brandon]
all that sh-t happened when i was 16
after that, felt like i was living on the big screen
the kids who offended me, got suspended
liz and i started talking and becoming more than friends
thomas became the dad i never had
he taught me so much stuff that my momma didn’t know how
i love her to death, but if he never came into my life i don’t know if i’d still be around
my grades were rising, my social life flourished, everything was so surprising
my meals were nourished, started lifting weights, gaining muscle with courage
life got refurbished
i thank thomas, before that day, it was the worse kind
at my house, laying in my bed, trying to find an excuse to flatline

now at 18, i’m about to graduate
but, i don’t know what route i want to take
college or career
thomas said, he’s always got an open spot for me here
but, i want to leave, i want to see what the world has in store for me

it’s my 21st birthday
i went through academy, p-ssing with flying colors like its a runway
everyone around me was like hairspray
they helped me stay in this place
and this is where i have the most sp-ce
to help kids that were just like me, win the race
i tell them when i can, you’re special
always do what you know is helpful
stay away from the devil and rise to another level
that’s something no one ever told me
i don’t know if it would’ve helped, but sh-t we’ll never see
we can never go back, and i don’t want to
i wanna move forward, i wanna punch through
to the next chapter of life
with my wife, liz
i’m planning on popping the question
ive already talked to thomas there was so second guessing
i just gotta do it, but i’m so nervous
my hands are sweaty and the car is kinda swerving
we get to where we had our first kiss
i get on my knee and before i open my lips
she says yes (hehe, yes)

30 years old now
we had a son and i’m so proud
i love watching him crawl around
i begin to think about how
my dad left me when i was bout this age
ive forgiven him, but d-mn it stays on my brain
i could never leave him, even if i had to
the force is better than before
we made it to number 1, thomas is to thank for that score
he’s the chief now, there’s no resting cases
we’ve been working hard, booking bad faces
you know this job isn’t always basic
i’ve been shot at a couple times, but luckily i’ve came home alive
luckily, i’ve been the one to survive
i’ve lost friends and family
my mom got diagnosed with stage 4 cancer see
she told me she didn’t want treatment
it costs too much, just keep it a secret
i said mom, no
i’m calling for a meeting, were gonna talk about getting you treatment
next day she died

now i’m 45
work is the same sh-t, i’m just happy to be alive
i’ve been talking at schools about mental and suicide
this is my purpose, this is why god kept me alive
every time i talk, kids come up to me
i show them my scar and tell them, don’t be like me
i was sad for the wrong reasons
i let it get to me before telling anyone how i was feeling
don’t be afraid
tell you teacher or coach, just not a blade
each one of you has a purpose
even if you feel it, you are not worthless
don’t keep things under the surface
and always tell someone if you get urges to do anything that could be hurtful

every time i talk to kids
it makes me think about the day that started all this

- synapse540 lyrics

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