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synful soldier - lost & clueless lyrics

(verse 1)
grew up on medication
tryna find myself in many different phases
agitation, built off my impatience
mood switches, constant changes
got my mind, it’s racing
lost and clueless, i won’t make it
man, i’m just saying
family screaming on a daily
got to manage my self-hatred
keeping stable, must maintain it
body’s shaking, i’m in danger tryna fake it
because lately
i felt like the world’s against me
so much issues, can’t escape it
while i’m standing there so stiff
feeling ashamed and everyone look at me crazy
because at my age there is an expectation
must accept the fact i am a failure, cannot change it
i’m forever lost and clueless
i just got to face it

(verse 2)
adhd, yeah it’s so amazing
broke and lazy, slowly pacing
at this rate man, i’ll be ghost at 18
so much, lately feel i’m going crazy
low-key raging, silently, it’s a nightly thing
anxiety, cannot release all of my-worries
doubtfully, i can’t see a brighter me
will i make it? probably, or not, i mean
i’m just saying what i believe
i know my family’s tired of me
well i don’t like myself neither, cause i’m a failure, honestly
i just stay in my room with the pen and my notes
tryna write what i’m feeling, but dont even know what i’m feeling no more
just a kid in the middle of something he do not fit into
and trying to make it but n0body understands what he must live through

(outro)
adhd, yeah it’s so amazing
broke and lazy, slowly pacing
at this rate man, i’ll be ghost at 18
so much, lately feel i’m going crazy
low-key raging, silently, it’s a nightly thing
anxiety, cannot release all of my-worries
doubtfully, i can’t see a brighter me
will i make it? probably, or not, i mean
i’m just saying what i believe
i know my family’s tired of me
well i don’t like myself neither, cause i’m a failure, honestly

- synful soldier lyrics

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