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ted the poet - life after (recover vi) lyrics

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(intro)
long live tommy
rowdy boy

(verse)
been ten years since the rowdy boys formed
nine years since tommy fell out of my dorm
eight years since my last therapy sesh
seven years since i left that apartment of horrors
been six years since i dropped that video that got
more hate than i was bargaining for
been five years since i hit rock bottom
d+mn near could’ve landed me a darwin award
been four years since i was last homeless
i ain’t even have to be, i was that broken
been three years since i began writing this novel
now it’s got dust, creaks when it cracks open
been two years since the breakdown
hated myself, never felt weaker than that moment
been one year since self+love returned
rowdy boys never did leave me, this fam’s chosen

(chorus)
i don’t wanna let go, but i can’t stay
trapped inside my head, inside my d+mn ways
let the dust settle, i’ve been on a rampage
self+blame told me i deserve this d+mn pain
i don’t wanna let go, but i can’t stay
trapped inside my head, inside my d+mn ways
let the dust settle, i’ve been on a rampage
self+love tells me i deserve a d+mn break
i deserve a d+mn break
(verse)
my old man said that there’s gonna be life before and life after
the healing process is no overnight fast one
there’s unspoken words no open mics slams could
provoke, crossed my heart and hoped to die faster
burrowed me a hole, the social ties, slashed ’em
the hoes come and go, but no surprise that was
i’m older and know the source of my patterns
i hope that they won’t just go through five tracks
and roll their eyes backwards
poet lives matter
i know that i’ve spattered over+s+xualized chatter at low hazard
i’m multi+tasking, soul is fighting back
as i hold it by the last thread, hope it climbs the ladder
my next album might just be your deciding factor
if i’m a dope rapper and hold a higher stature
i’ve let go of my past, immortalized, and that’s the
last recover song, i close the final chapter

(chorus)
i don’t wanna let go, but i can’t stay
trapped inside my head, inside my d+mn ways
let the dust settle, i’ve been on a rampage
self+blame told me i deserve this d+mn pain
i don’t wanna let go, but i can’t stay
trapped inside my head, inside my d+mn ways
let the dust settle, i’ve been on a rampage
self+love tells me i deserve a d+mn break



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