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teddy grey - john's lament lyrics

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[john]
5 years ago, i bought a cat
too keep me company, and that
wasn’t enough, so i bought a dog
now in this house that’s full of pets
pill bottles, vodka, and regret
as i sit around and slap my hog

why can’t the hole ever be filled?
not even with illegal pills
cheap gin and whisky
worthless stuff
and now the best thing that was in my world
my lover lizz, my golden girl
she tells me that i’m just not good enough
she thinks that i’m a nut
well, lizz, you know what

it’s time the world will come and see
that i’m john arbuckle, and you will all remember me
i’ll be the man they can’t ignore
put up with this too long
and i won’t take sh+t anymorе

you can’t hold me down
if i put you in the ground
it’s just the pills saying this now
i’vе got to get a grip somehow
side effects include fits of rage
this rush that’s soaring through my veins
i can’t describe; i can’t explain
someone should lock me in a cage

24 years ago, when i was 6
my parents got me a therapist
for all my violent tendancies
20 years ago, when i was 10
they got me a therapist again
for k!lling our dog elouise

carving canines with my knife
how did i lose that l+st for life

it’s time the world will come and see
that i’m john arbuckle, and you will all remember me
it’s time that i start fighting back
you better look out assh0l+s
i’m plotting my first attack

you can’t hold me down
if i put you in the ground
[john’s doctor]
john, this is your doctor
your mental health has lost control

[police]
john, this is the police
[?] and murder by a latest parole

[john’s mother]
john, this is your mother
and murder is a big no+no

[charles manson]
john, this is charles manson
and murder is so worth it, bro

[john]
thought i could make it through this life
settled down with my pets, 3 children, and a caring wife
i guess that love’s just not for me
but i can’t fake a life of forced, complicit normalcy
i wonder if i k!ll
would the hole inside be filled?

- teddy grey lyrics

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