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thats not sexy - you don't love me lyrics

[intro]
you don’t love me
i’m not sure you ever did
‘cuz if you loved me
you wouldn’t like him
and we all know you do ‘cuz you said it to my face
but you’re
gonna lie the moment i get mad

[bridge]
‘cuz you don’t care if i’m happy
you don’t care about my mental state
the only person you care about is you
you pretend to care
make it seem like you care
so you don’t feel like the horrible person you are

[verse 1]
but you’re a bad, bad, bad, bad actor
and you’re a bad, bad, bad, bad, bad dad
you’re a bad, bad, bad, bad actor
and a worse, worse, worse, worse, dad

[verse 2]
you like to lie!
you makе me question my sanity, going
on and on wondering how much i’vе made up
and i
start to think that maybe i’m an awful person because
you can’t be, i must be making it up!
[verse 3]
i must be making it up because i’m full of teenage angst and
i must be making it up because i’m full of rage and
i must be making it up because i’m just a stupid little girl
i must be making it up because you’d never hate me
i must be making it up because you acted like you loved me
i must be making it up because you were my hero
i must be making it up because i loved you too

[verse 4]
i loved you!
i did!
i loved you!
you took all of my childhood innocence and you smashed it to the ground!
you took my near+permanent happiness and you made me feel like sh+t!
and yet i loved you!

[verse 5]
but
you know what?
i’m tired of being the broken one
i’m tired of crying alone
i’m tired of you ruining my life
i’m tired of being scared
i’m tired of being screamed at just because you’re p+ssed that people who aren’t like you exist
i’m tired of dealing with your sh+t
[verse 6]
i’m done being the bigger person when being the bigger person was your job
i’m done supporting the mental health of the person who ruined mine
if you feel bad, i’ll be happy
i want you to feel bad
i want you to feel the combined pain of all the pain you’ve caused me
i’m done being bigger
i’m done with that moral bullsh+t
i’m done with telling myself that i’m bad for wanting you to hurt
because i’m not
you are
you’re awful
you’re terrible
you’re the worst person i know

[verse 7]
and if you get better
that’s good for you
but once i’m eighteen years old
and i can get out of this place
i never want to see you again

[outro]
i don’t care if you get better
i don’t care if you’re sorry
because for so many years i’ve had to be bigger
and i’m done
it’s your fault that i’m leaving
it’s your fault that your own kid hates you
don’t you dare blame this on teenage rebellion
don’t you dare make yourself feel better
it’s your fault
it’s all you
i hate you

- thats not sexy lyrics

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