the chalkeaters - todd howard e3 2019 song — it just works (bethesda parody) lyrics
[verse]
watch this: our newest release!
the legendary series you’ve missed for years
comes back, get ready for some action!
got couple bugs in here, some broken scripts right there
the fans will fix it anyway so we don’t care!
they’ll patch it through micro transactions
so enjoy your pretty nylon bag
oh and boy, stop sh-tting on our swag
you’re not getting any money back
you knew that was a one way wacky track
just shut up and have your nylon bag!
coming up with it was a real drag!
all proceeds go strictly to vault-tec
so you’re not getting your money back!
[chorus]
it just works, it just works
little lies, stunning shows
people buy, money flows, it just works
it just works, it just works
overpriced open worlds
earnings rise, take my word
it just works
it just works
it just works
it just works
[verse]
our tech is cutting edge as far as i can tell
the creation engine’s aging very well
we’re not planning on
doing anything about it
skyrim’s the limit, don’t deny it
see this mountain? you can buy it
in the dlc for the price of a real mountain!
what’s wrong with a train in place of your head?
come on, believe me you’ve seen noting yet
the battle sp-ceship with the dragon animation
will become a new sensation on the internet
just shut up, give us your every dime
buying an armored horse is not a crime!
our devs could eat the shadowmere alive so
buy skyrim one more todd d-mn time!
[chorus]
it just works, it just works
little lies, stunning shows
people buy, money flows, it just works
it just works, it just works
overpriced open worlds
earnings rise, take my word
it just works
it just works
it just works
[verse}
we don’t want your endless sh-t
it’s just not the game we need
sick of looting useless junk
graphics making our eyes bleed
we don’t want your endless sh-t
it’s just not the game we need
sick of looting useless junk
graphics making our eyes bleed
[verse]
now listen up!
welcome to the place washed by iliac waves
there’s two and a half peasants with the same ugly face
you’re not into small towns? check out big–ss plains!
50 times the size of skyrim’s, twice as many pointless caves!
you see, we at bethesda know exactly what you want
hardcore gamers inspired us to improve shopping a lot
not each lockpick must be bought for an actual ten spot
and saving now is a paid mod for just twenty a slot
you’re never getting bored, you’ll have infinite quests
there’s every vagabond will put you to the test
you’ll be richly awarded with infinite chests
full of rusty swords and used pregnancy tests
we got rid of sk!ll trees, they were old and lame
who needs a leveling system in a role-playing game?
you came to slash and k!ll and save one more nation
no more levels and sk!lls, only degradation!
[chorus]
it just works, it just works
little lies, stunning shows
people buy, money flows, it just works
it just works, it just works
overpriced open worlds
earnings rise, take my word
it just works, it just works
little lies, stunning shows
people buy, money flows!
it just works!
it just works!
it just works!
it just works!
it just works!
it just works!
it just works!
it just works!
so who’s laughing now?
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