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the cool greenhouse - cardboard man lyrics

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well i love the women
y’know they’re so good at cooking
and i love the coloureds
they’re just so d+mn good+looking
i even love the g+ys
y’know one does my hair+cutting
and when i see a pig’s head
y’know i think of… nothing

’cause i’m a cardboard man
yes i’m a cardboard man
well my thoughts are all cardboard
i’m just like my old man

and i’m down with the kids
’cause my facts are alternative
and i won strictly come dancing
oh, without even trying
and i’ve got a nasty coke habit
good thing you know nothing about it
i’ve got medium+sized hands
there’s no two ways about it

i’m a cardboard man, man
i’m a cardboard cut+out
yes i’m a cardboard man
oh i’m made of wet cardboard (white cardboard)

my favourite metal is gold
my favourite liquid is water
my favourite gas is hot air
and i love harry potter
y’know i’m a west ham supporter
or was it aston villa?
well you can see right through me
i’m like a glass of water

’cause i’m a cardboard man
yes i’m a cardboard man
and i’m a cardboard cut+out
of a cardboard cut+out
of a cardboard man

take a photo of me
down your local boozer
i’m just an ordinary geezer
but with a smeg fridge+freezer
and i care about everyone
as much as cardboard can
i didn’t ask to be comfortable
well, pity the white man
y’know i’m a laid back guy
i never ask for trouble
but if you look at me funny
i’m gonna drop a bomb on your hospital

and i did not have s+xual relations with that woman
or with that pig

now throw tomatoes
at the cardboard man
throw all your tomatoes
as hard as you can
and if you’ve got a lettuce
well you can throw that too
oh, throw all your vegetables
at this cardboard fool

- the cool greenhouse lyrics

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