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the half artist - how much addiction cost? lyrics

i used to say that i loved em before the panic was something
now look at me, regret the consumption, face of a substance
forget the weed, im talkin bout everything
losing control but get those boulders by any means
no longer that 17, almost 30, don’t let em see
that you’re a different version of the person you used to be
remember that little kid right before he became a fiend?
if only i knеw what i know now back at 23
my parents are worried, i bеt their judgement is bittersweet
your assumptions are correct but being right couldn’t get me clean
the cost of a whispers nothin when listening to talk is cheap
come pay me a visit when you’ve been living as poor as me
i know what the issue is, just look what addiction did
i used to silence voices, what i mix the depression with
no effort to make it stop, 3 hits and you’re gettin robbed
more than my bank account, how much does addiction cost?

higher than you imagine while tryin’ to pursue a passion
drugs don’t make you an artist you’ve either got it or haven’t
the half is 50% n the others all of my habits
my conscience bickers with being, i guess i needed more practice
honest meant being ugly, live the human condition
slip through cracks of the system, they just assume i was different
its either that or addiction, don’t even have a prescription
i grab it right off the shelf, my secret shame is a liquid..
n imma drink to that, toast the excuse
i might splash cash on my whistle but not a drop on my suit
dressed for success means ive got a lot to improve..
refer to the second person but not as often as you
i’ve been good lately.. but never not in the mood
my parents hate me.. clean don’t mean a mop n a broom
i’m still ya baby.. made it past 22, its amazing
i’m 28 now, to think about 30 is devastating
.. so i don’t mind waiting
where will you be in 10 years?.. seein’ my friends pushin’ up daisies
the older we get, the more we lose, the cost is changing
but thats the price we pay to hide the pain, demand is crazy
so we put ourselves in debt to forget.. remember that
i hate to say i told you so, so i read it back
i spoke my own eulogy from an anti+depressant pack
here lies experience of existence you’ll never have
how much a dollar really cost? more than i’ve got
with only me to blame.. my pockets full of notes that can’t be changed
they might not be worthless but to them it ain’t worth sh+t
when you didn’t wear my shoes all yours saw was a burnt bridge
my clothes reek of failure and cologne that i couldn’t quit
the same as the old man at the hole with the toothless grin
sittin’ all alone he’ll never know im the future him
i hope my kids say ‘that was back when dad used to drink’…

- the half artist lyrics

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