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the jolly rogers - oldest profession lyrics

[verse 1]
i’ve tried life as a sailor, a pirate and a thief
but it was not ’til now that i knew what i should be
i swaggered through the brothel doors and marched straight ahead
when i reached the counter i looked at the girl and said:

[chorus]
“i want to be a trollop, a harlot or a wh0re
i want to be a jezebel, a floozy and what’s more
i was meant to be a strumpet, i’m just a tramp at heart
so i’m here to be a prostitute, a hooker or a tart!”
[verse 2]
well i guess it shocked her, she did not know what to say
then she said “that’s impossible it doesn’t work that way.”
“i’ll demonstrate just what i got” was the pitch i gave
she nearly had a stroke, but she wasn’t quite that brave

[verse 3]
she told me that i should talk to all the girls upstairs
’cause no approval i could find would mean more then theirs
when i reached the second floor they poured into the hall
and i said, “h+llo ladies, i’ve got something to tell you all.”

[verse 4]
they laughed and said, “there is no way, it never has been done.”
but a girl said “let’s find out” and led me in room number 1
and six hours later when i left room 24
i knew that i had managed to satisfy the floor!

[verse 5]
they said, “there’s a girl upstairs for special clientele
for you to have a chance she’s the one could really tell.”
i climbed the stairs, knocked on the door and said to her, “h+llo!”
“before we start anything there’s something you should know,”
[chorus]
“i want to be a trollop, a harlot or a wh0re
i want to be a jezebel, a floozy and what’s more
i was meant to be a strumpet, i’m just a tramp at heart
so i’m here to be a prostitute, a hooker or a tart!”

[verse 6]
she said that it was funny and she laughed at my plan
and told me i could never hack it because i was just a man
so i said “let me prove it” and i did l!ckity+split
and trust me when i tell you, boys, i took my time with it

[verse 7]
she panted, “i admit it, i was wrong right from the start
go upstairs and see the madam and you’ll work here if she’s smart!”
i went to he madam’s office and let myself right in
“finally!” i thought and i said to her with a grin:

[verse 8]
“i’ll give you just one chance to prove you’re not out of your head,”
and i knew that i had proved it when she looked at me and said
“gee, you found the spot i thought was legend or a myth
you make a perfect case that i find hard to argue with!”
[verse 9]
women now are working on the ships and docks and shores
and should have the same options as the men who came before
so now i have a job taking care of ladies’ needs
and all you jealous b+st+rds should come sing along with:

“i want to be a trollop, a harlot or a wh0re
i want to be a jezebel, a floozy and what’s more
i was meant to be a strumpet, i’m just a tramp at heart
so i’m here to be a prostitute, a hooker or a tart!”

- the jolly rogers lyrics

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