the lonely island - space olympics lyrics
reach for the stars!
you stand on a distant planet
skyline of red plateaus
strange air and vegetation
you’re a winner!
welcome to the sp-ce olympics
the year thirty twenty two
take part in a grand tradition
your name echoes in the holes of the universe!
believe in yourself!
take your game into outer sp-ce!
every single galactic athlete
needs a coded id badge
drug tests are mandatory
you’re a winner!
the athlete’s village is on zargon
you all get a junior suite
we don’t cover incidentals
so keep your -ss off the minibar!
you’re the best in the world!
brace yourself ’cause there’s no gravity!
you’re in the motherf-ckin’ sp-ce olympics!
let it be known by every nation
you’ll only get one meal a day
there was a bit of a budget snafu
and food funding is insufficient
we can’t really enforce a curfew
as there is no light or sound
just one of the many problems
with hosting a sporting event in sp-ce.
attention all athletes. there are minor scheduling adjustments.
sp-ce disc! is totally cancelled.
sp-ce swords! is totally cancelled.
sp-ce luge! is also cancelled.
and all other events are pending!
welcome to your sp-ce olympics
all the oxygen has run out
and someone who will not be named
accidentally hit self-destruct
as you file to your escape pods
i’ll distract the alien hordes
and as i stare death in the face i know my sins will take me to h-ll.
you do it for the love
my love
and there ain’t no woman that could take your spot my love
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