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the longest johns - the last bristolian pirate lyrics

[verse 1]
oh i used to be a farmer and i made a living fine
i had a little stretch of land, along the western line
but times were hard and though i tried the money wasn’t there
and bankers came and took my land and told me: “fair is fair.”

[verse 2]
i looked for every kind of job, the answer always: “no”
“hire you now?”, they’d always laugh, “we just let twenty go”
the government they promised me a measly little sum
but i’ve got too much pride to end up just another bum

and i said: “who gives a d+mn if all the jobs are gone
i’m going to be a pirate on the river severn!”

(yarr!)

[verse 3]
you’d think the other farmers would know that i’m at large
but just the other day i saw an unsuspecting barge
i snuck up right behind them and they were none the wiser
i rammed their boat and sank it and i stole the fertilizer!
[verse 4]
the bridge outside of redwick spans a mighty river
farmers cross in so much fear their stomachs are a+quiver
cause they know that tractor jack is hiding in the bay
i’ll jump the bridge and knock them cold
and sail off with their hay!

[verse 5]
well officer robbie chased me he was always at my throat
but he followed on the shoreline cause he didn’t own a boat
but cut backs were a+coming and the copper lost his job
and now he sails with us and we call him salty rob!

[verse 6]
a swinging sword, a skull and bones a pleasant company
i’ll never pay my income tax and screw the vat (screw it!)
sailing down to th+rnbury, the terror of the sea
if you wanna get to tesco, boys, you’ve gotta get by me!
[chorus]
and it’s a+ heave+ho hi+ho
coming down the plains
stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
and it’s a+ ho+hey hi+hey farmers bar your doors
when you see the jolly roger on the severn’s mighty shores

[verse 7]
well pirate life’s appealing but you don’t just find it here
i hear that up in yorkshire there’s a band of buccaneers
they roam around the yorkshire dales from smith to beverley
and you’re bound to lose your flat cap if you have to pass their way

[verse 8]
winter is a+coming and a chill is in the breeze
my pirate days are over if the rivers start to freeze
but i’ll be back in springtime and now i’ve got to fly
i hear there’s lots of plundering down in the isle of wight

[chorus]
and it’s a+ heave+ho hi+ho
coming down the plains
stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
and it’s a+ ho+hey hi+hey farmers bar your doors
when you see the jolly roger on the severn’s mighty shores
and it’s a+ heave+ho hi+ho
coming down the plains
stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains
and it’s a+ ho+hey hi+hey farmers bar your doors
when you see the jolly roger on the severn’s mighty shores
when you see the jolly roger on the severn’s mighty shores

- the longest johns lyrics

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