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the pine box boys - meet my wife lyrics

[narration]
an old man said a prayer, and the meeting was concluded
and the farmers and the wives went to shake the preacher’s hand
some p-ssed a jar around, clear and undiluted
what the lord had given them the government had banned
jubal took a sip or two, and began to feel much bolder
introduced himself to prester john as a lost sheep from his flock
prester john smiled, and put a hand upon his shoulder
he said, “let me have another sip, and we’ll go somewhere to talk.”
jubal said, “i’m filled with hate, and traveling now for vengeance
those who got within my way, well, i haven’t treated kindly
teach me how to pray and i will do my penance
and if the devil gets in my way, i’ll kick him back behind me.”
prester john looked fatherly, warm and sympathizing
and jubal felt a-weeping for the first time in his life
“let me take you down the mountain to the river for baptizing
we’ll be back in time to share supper with my wife.”

[verse 1]
meet my wife, she has a beard
she grows it long and keeps it neat
like a field of summer wheat with harvest near
meet my wife, she has a beard
carny sideshow, circus freak
flutters when she speaks she’s mighty dear

[chorus]
meet my wife
she has a beard
love of my life
i like ’em weird
i like ’em weird

[verse 2]
meet my wife, a cute kid
i met her on the midway, lookin’ fine
i knew someday i’d make her mine and i did
meet my wife, pretty as can be
for her beard i brought a gift
a fishbone to comb it with, and she married me

[chorus]
meet my wife
she has a beard
love of my life
i like ’em weird
i like ’em weird

meet my wife, more hair than me
pans of biscuits, bowls of gravy
i’m her daddy, she’s my baby, and none happier than we!
meet my wife, i don’t like ’em thin
i like ’em to carry a little load
with more curves than a mountain road, and a hairy chin

[chorus]
meet my wife
she has a beard
love of my life
i like ’em weird
i like ’em weird

[narration]
the sight of that perfectly groomed beard, salt and peppery, on that woman’s smiling face, and her hand extended all pleased to make your acquaintance, snapped jubal back from the brink of epiphany

now he was cagey, that jubal was, and he didn’t say nothing just now. but he got his things, and he and prester john started off down the mountain to go to the river, y’know, for baptizing

first thing prester john noticed was that coffin jubal was dragging, he said, “you don’t mind me asking, what you got that coffin for?”
jubal answered, “i swore to bury my mama right.”
“what you doing with that crow locked in that cage?”
“keeps me company at night.”
“what you doing with that pistol in your pants?”
“that’s for trading shots with you and me, and that moon that’s shining bright.”

prester john said nothing. jubal sat down and made three hand-prints in the dirt. then he looked up at prester john

prester john, you could see he was amazed, and he nodded that he understood. he placed his hand over his heart, he sighed, and he said…

- the pine box boys lyrics

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