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the tommy lasorda experience - i don't feel so good all of a sudden lyrics

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heyyyyyy
ohhhhhhh

there are power lines
on either side of my street
and my bathroom looks out on
an electrical junction box

it’s 15+20 feet away
but i believe it is responsible
for high levels of
mind+altering radiation
in the bathroom

last week i went in there to take a shower
and i wound up shaving my body completely
it took like 45 minutes
and ruined the razor cartridge

over the weekend
i decided that the tub looked dirty
i have a thing about floormats
and i wash my car floormats in the bathtub
every three weeks or so with woolite
and grime kind of accumulated
so i took a power sander and sanded the tub
it didn’t make it any cleaner
which is ok
the stupid thing has to be re+glazed anyway

so then i sanded the soles of my feet
especially the heels
which were a little calloused
that worked much better

then tonight i was brushing my t++th
and i didn’t see any toothpaste
so i used clorox softscrub with bleach

it actually didn’t taste bad at all
it tastes a lot better than urine
and million times better than gasoline
it didn’t make my t++th whiter though
no it didn’t

i wish they’d build radiation shields or something

- the tommy lasorda experience lyrics

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