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the willis clan - ode to a toad lyrics

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jeremiah was a toad
sitting by the country road
squat and slimy – big and fat
aren’t you glad you’re not like that?

he sat and stared at flea and fly
and watched the people p-ssing by
obnoxious fumes were hanging ‘round
from engines speeding on the ground
mud was splashing
h-rns were clashing
such an awful toady place
in mud he wallowed – bugs he swallowed
nasty grins upon his face

what warts he had and pimples too
what awful things he liked to do
till then one day while feeling foul
and eyeing traffic with a scowl
he saw a bug both big and plump
a nice and juicy buzzing rump
with beady gaze and greedy ways
he sat and waited in the haze
till there, aha, it came in reach
and so he sn-tched it like a peach

he tongue was long and lighting quick
though such a snack would make me sick
he gulped it down with grand delight
making a disgusting sight

but oh, what’s wrong?
he grabbed his throat
his manner desperate i took note
ah, it seemed the bite was much too big
now what a greedy selfish pig
but there he was in dire plight
putting up a gruesome fight
it wasn’t pretty, it was not nice
he tried to to call for help – twice

he couldn’t ribbit, he couldn’t croak
all he did was choke and choke
finally in desperation
giving way to aggravation
out he stepped into the street
never knowing what he’d meet

a p-ssing car was unaware
of tragedy occurring there
and lickity split, berb-mp, ker-splat
the grup was gone…
the toad was flat

a pancake colored brown and green
the spectacle was quite obscene
but i have to say a fitting end
for one so foul and without friend
no one mourned, no one cried
one more toad just up and died
in fact, unless i wrote this ode
none would know of jair the toad



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