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therealdylann - sick lyrics

i′m just getting done
waiting for the sickness
to take me away

and i’ll fight it
i don′t need no more
and i already died

already dead inside
i commit suicide
every night when i break a new seal
i run away from myself
every chance that i get
cause it’s easy
it’s too hard to heal
never accepted by anyone ever
but f+ck all them people
and f+ck how they feel
exhausted i′m tired
don′t wanna keep going
i flirt with the percocet
xanax and steel
i make thе room spin
by now i’m use to it′s sickening movemеnt
it’s an illusion
it′s a reminder
that my time is looming
hardly a human
i’m just a vassal
the chemicals use me
it′s so confusing
did i choose them?
i don’t know
did they choose me?

i’m just getting done
waiting for the sickness
to take me away
and i′ll fight it
i don′t need no more
and i already died

controlled like a voodoo doll
life’s sticking pins in me
cursed i deserve it
i don′t want your sympathy
no going back
i can’t do no sh+t differently
can′t help but laugh
what the h+ll’s gotten into me?
my imperfections
twisted obsessions
manic depression
thousands of questions
sad adolescence
bad first impressions
big disconnections
valuable lessions

why do i constantly have to start over?
for once in my life
can i finally have closure?
for once in my life
can i keep my composure?
i stay f+cking up
and i never stay sober

was i always ment to be just mediocre?
at this rate i′m finished
i’ll never get older
internal fight with myself
i’m bipolar
i walk a fine line
between chaos and order

i′m just getting done
waiting for the sickness
to take me away
and i′ll fight it
i don’t need no more
and i already died
i′m throwing up words
cause i can’t stomach
the things that i′m thinking and feeling
don’t wanna reveal all the secrets i′m keeping
but if i don’t do this
my heart won’t start beating
pills put me to sleep
but they made me stop dreaming
defeated
i′m weak in a war
without reason
i′m blind when i drink
i don’t know what i′m seeing
i’m right on the brink
on the edge
i′ve been fiending

i make the room spin
by now i’m use to it′s sickening movement
it’s an illusion
it’s a reminder
that my time is looming
hardly a human
i′m just a vassal
the chemicals use me
it′s so confusing
did i choose them?
i don’t know
did they choose me?

i′m just getting done
waiting for the sickness
to take me away
and i’ll fight it
i don′t need no more
and i already died

- therealdylann lyrics

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