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through distant eyes - the green door lyrics

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it is seeping into my awareness
i get steered by a puppeteer
a pile of clay in the hands of a god
a slave to his notions
crystal clear, the truth unfolds
finally found the reason for my aching soul
with a heavy heart, a bleeding heart, i dare to say:
you don’t want to help me, you’re trying to shape me
my life’s a compensation
for your own insecurities

after all
after all that we have been through
i still can’t decide, if
i should love or hate you
every now and then
the failures of our shared time span
strike back at me again

a bitter taste remains
this is what you’ve made me become
i am nothing more than a surrogate
just a placeholder
for your buried fantasies

just look around
and witness the greatness
you could have created
instead of pushing all your grief and anger
on the ones that once loved you

the moment of relief at that point of time
when i realized, i’m the one to define myself
deciding to leave, yet standing in line
to get clubbed by your needs
i made this promise to myself:
i will no longer let you ruin me

(remission you claimed,)
every now and then
(whithout debate.)
the failures of our shared time span
(take this final piece of me!)
strike back at me again

torture my burnt soul
until i break
until i quit



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