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townes van zandt - wouldn't that be nice lyrics

[blaze foley]
i feel like, s’always kinda funny for me, doin’ stuff like this for me ’cause, remember when you were a kid and you had to get your picture taken, with your brothers and sisters? and one of ’em just k!lled your goldfish, you know? but they’d heard you cuss, so they were gonna tell mother if you told them about the goldfish? stuff like that. ‘ok we’re gonna have our picture taken, now. you kids.’ it’s kinda like that, still. that’s why, one reason i close my eyes. like my friend townes van zandt says, ‘well if the audience would close theirs, we wouldn’t have to close ours.’

[townes van zandt]
this another…treat. well uh, blaze told me this song was about, uh, people who were afraid of someone for no reason. and, uh, he apparently wrote it in a parking lot of a grocery store. and it goes like this:

well, lock your door lady or i’ll jump in your car
i know you know how nasty we are
poke out your eyeb-lls and make you a scar
make you have to walk real far
mess up your hairdo and sit on your face
scatter your makeup all over the place
take all your money and kidnap your kids
take all your money and buy me some lids
then i’ll call up your husband and tell him you’re dead
take out your tonsils and make you give head
let out the air out of all of your tires
take out your molars with needle-nose pliers
make you do everything you don’t want to do
buy me some earthworms and smear them on you
put your fat head in a rusty old vice
yeah, wouldn’t that be nice

- townes van zandt lyrics

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