tuan x - through the storm lyrics
[poem: rainmaker]
i sit heavy..
because there is an anvil chained
to a twilight sky in my stomach
a screaming dog
barking the secret of life
and a gypsy using the earth
like a marble in my voice
trying to understand
the shaman sun bathing on my tongue
a gun
shooting a bullet
in the shape of a woman giving birth
to an army of unicorns in my fingers
and a mermaid arguing in my pen
but i remember
when she used to hold me in the thick of us
our inhale might as well have been
laced with dragon’s breath
until she told me
she needed to get away from my gravity
after i orbited around another sun
[verse 1: tuan x]
i was once your eyes
that you used to see
straight through all my lies
and hypocrisy
and i was once your hands
that kept you safe from harm
but will we survive?
[hook: tuan x & sabrina clery]
(through the storm!)
when i was scared
i would run from you
(through the storm!)
and i can’t
(will we survive?)
sing your name the same
when i was scared
i would run from you
(through the storm!)
every time i’d reach nowhere
(will we survive?)
nowhere.. nowhere..
[verse 2: tuan x]
i was once your nose
that you used to smell
every foul word
that i used to yell
and i was once your tongue
that you used to taste
infidelity
left below my waste
and i was once your ears
that you used to hear
every woman sing
whenever you were near
and i was once your hands
that kept you safe from harm
but will we survive?
[hook]
[verse 3: tuan x]
i was once the soul
that you so revered
only to find my scriptures
were lies i told for years
and i was once your hands
that kept you safe from harm
but will we survive?
(can we?)
[poem: rainmaker]
said sometimes
i feel like a black dot on a white canvas
empty and full all at the same time
and i asked her
the morning after
“do you still love me?”
told me, “maybe in another life.”
said the pain was so deep
she would have to unzip her bones
in order to love me again
and i am here
a carefully carried heartbreak
[hook]
[poem: rainmaker]
wishing for a severed moment
when my insides touched hers
and you felt it in the middle of the night
i will speak of how i lost you
to the weight of my man and my flesh
my desires, urgent back then
but now i find myself thinking of you
unwilling to love another the way i loved you
the way you were always meant to me
i cannot move on
and these dreams in the 7th hour of the day
keep showing me an image
of setting my heart on fire
and breaking my ribs to spell your name
your name
the only one i can never forget
somewhere
on a table
there is a ring
and the rest
of my life
(when i was scared i would run from you)
(when i was scared i would run from you)
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