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utter nonsense - helios the poet lyrics

[spoken verse]
edwin johnson was working down beside the thames when he saw something floating. he loved collecting pieces of old metal, and when he saw this piece (a big piece) he knew he was in for a treat
he rushed home, grabbed a fishing rod and was off. it wasn’t hard to get out. in fact, there was no chance that this could be metal. to his great disappointment, this was merely a wooden throne. still, thrones aren’t found in the ocеan that often, so he took it home

thе next morning, edwin looked downstairs and saw that someone had knocked over everything in his house. at first he thought someone had broken in, but then he remembered he had quadruple locked all the windows and doors. somehow his chair had been fixed. he picked it up, and threw it straight back into the river

of course, that wasn’t the end. four days later, it arrived back in his garden

after many more failed attempts to dispose of it, he gathered something: he could only get rid of it by passing it onto someone else. so, on the 30th + the 31st + of december, when everyone was partying down on the street, edwin johnson snuck into the thames++

edwin johnson snuck it into thomas benson’s garden. it didn’t get passed around much from there

4th of may 2007

johnathan benson carried the strange, decrepit chair along the street. a thought came over him: should i really get rid of this? it has been with my family for generations. well, if he was going to keep it, he should have stopped a little while ago. the antique shop stood right before him

he sighed, muttered goodbye to the chair, and pushed open the brass doors. he went in

the antique shop was a dull place, completely the opposite of what you would expect from a shop selling objects from all time. scouring the building, johnathan noticed a shrunken head which he thought would look good on his mantlepiece. he shuddered. no, he wasn’t here to buy anything. he needed money. suddenly, a chameleonic man came out from behind the wall
“got somethin’ for me?” he muttered. johnathan nodded
“bring it over,”

“well, it’s good, but…” johnathan benson sat eagerly awaiting the result
“but what?” he shouted
the shopkeeper sighed. “i’m sorry, it’s just…”
i don’t know

“so, are you gonna take it?” johnathan benson couldn’t handle it much longer. he had been pretending he didn’t want to part with it, but he couldn’t keep it up. he hated that chair
the shopkeeper shouted
“no. now get outta my shop!”

and as johnathan opened the brass doors, he filled with pain. in anger, he grabbed the chair by the legs and smashed it against the ground. he told himself he was happy now. he told his friends he was happy now. but deep down he knew he wasn’t free

- utter nonsense lyrics

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